Topic: Eldar's big night out!

[Terry in Australia]

Eldy got a job on a ranch in North Dakota as a ranch hand for a beautiful widow, Linda, who's husband had recently died in a terribly tragic cow-poking-gone-wrong accident.

Linda, was very pleased with Eldy's hard work, and after a couple of weeks she said, "It's Saturday night Eldar, so why don't you go into town and kick up your heels?" Eldy agreed happily and invited Linda to come with him to the local dance hall, but she politely refused, and he could see that far away sad look on her face, so he quietly got dressed and went out without another word.

Linda waited by the fire for Eldy's return, reminiscing about how she loved to go dancing on a saturday night with her husband Sammy, who didn't look all that unlike Eldar, in fact, from some angles Eldy looked very familiar, and Linda wondered if that had been what attracted her to him in the first place? She put away those feelings though, as Sammy had only been in the ground a few months, and she felt bad for even entertaining those kinds of thoughts.

Midnight came and went, but no sign of Eldy.

1 am, and still no Eldy.

Around 2am, Eldy returned and was surprised to see that Linda was waiting up for him, and he slowly, tentatively approaches her.

Without even asking him how his big night was she looks right into his eyes and says, "Take off my blouse"

Shocked, with shaking fingers, Eldy fumbles her buttons undone, and removes her beautiful silk blouse, and places it on the rug.

"Now take off my bra" Linda whispers, in a hoarse voice, a single tear running down her beautiful cheek. Eldy removes her beautiful black lacy bra and places it beside her blouse.

"Now my boots" she says, so Eldy, red faced, hands shaking uncontrollably, kneels before her, and fumbles off her boots.

"Take off my skirt" says Linda. Eldar reaches around behind, and unzips her pretty cowgirl skirt, and eases it slowly to the floor.

And finally, "Take off my panties", she half whispers, half growls, with a wild look in her eye.

Eldy places his quivering thumbs inside the elastic of her tiny black lace panties, almost overcome with nervousness. He eases them off, trying not to gaze on her beauty, lest he embarrass himself in front of her.

Finally, naked, she looks up at him and says, "And if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you're fired!"

[scunny]

an oldy but a goody, I still get a chuckle out of that one

[dusterdude]

omfg,that was hilarious terry,ya gotta watch those k8 guys.

[eldar]

Oh come now, I thought wearing womens clothes was required of a person living Oz? Isnt that where this all originated?

[Terry in Australia]

You've heard it many times before Eldy, and no doubt you'll hear it many times again, "No prize for seconds", ha ha! 

[kghost]

You've heard it many times before Eldy, and no doubt you'll hear it many times again, "No prize for seconds", ha ha! 

On the money terry.......firstest with the mostest wins.

btw I near busted a gut

[eldar]

No prize for second, which is why I have a K8. I could have gone with your run-of-the-mill K1 or some such ordinary thing but I decided on something more exotic and powerful. The power of a F2 without the hideous wheels!

[Terry in Australia]

No prize for second, which is why I have a K8. I could have gone with your run-of-the-mill K1 or some such ordinary thing but I decided on something more exotic and powerful. The power of a F2 without the hideous wheels!

Like I said Eldy, no prize for seconds mate, have a look in the archives at your earlier post where you were wanting to fit comstars to that fat underpowered slug of a K8 last year, geez, you change your mind more often than I change my underpants, ha ha! Cheers, Terry. 

[eldar]

Not the early comstars! The later ones, like those off a 650 or 900. Different design there! You gotta stop wearing those old, holey, things you call underwear! Funny how I am underpowered when a tuned k8 can keep up with a K0!

[Terry in Australia]

Not the early comstars! The later ones, like those off a 650 or 900. Different design there! You gotta stop wearing those old, holey, things you call underwear! Funny how I am underpowered when a tuned k8 can keep up with a K0!

S'Funny #2, I've got a CB900 front wheel in my garage, and apart from those beautiful lightweight alloy spokes, it's EXACTLY the same design, even the F2 discs bolt straight up? Not as strong as the "original and the best" as apparently the rivets can come loose, but very light for racing? Hmmnnn, and a K8 can keep up with a K0? Who says, cousin Enis?

Ha ha, well maybe, but you know that if you put that wheezing, porcine, "parts bin special" against a mighty (if not slightly fragile, like a true thoroughbred) F2/F3, you'd still come second, and only if there weren't any F1's running that day, ha ha! Cheers, "Holey Pants" Terry.

[eldar]

Dont know there. the 650 coms seem to look different to me so do the early 80s 900 coms but then your bike is from oz and that could make the diff. As for keeping up with a K0, it has been said a couple of times by others here, not me. And being as how I have a virtually identical engine as the F2, with a little less weight if the specs on this forum are correct, I would be able to go wit hany stock f2. add the 2.73 sprocket ratio, I do pretty good!

but as I have said before, K8 envy takes many forms! Duster has it and looks like you do to! And here I thought you got over passing up that K8 a while back!

[Terry in Australia]

Dont know there. the 650 coms seem to look different to me so do the early 80s 900 coms but then your bike is from oz and that could make the diff. As for keeping up with a K0, it has been said a couple of times by others here, not me. And being as how I have a virtually identical engine as the F2, with a little less weight if the specs on this forum are correct, I would be able to go wit hany stock f2. add the 2.73 sprocket ratio, I do pretty good!

but as I have said before, K8 envy takes many forms! Duster has it and looks like you do to! And here I thought you got over passing up that K8 a while back!

Well #2, as always, you're not quite right, the early comstars were the same, then the later comstars were reversed, then they became "Boomerang" shaped, but no-one with any taste at all could love them, the originals really were the best.

The K8 engine has very few similarities in spec to the mighty F2/F3, in fact, the K7/K8 engines were a detuned version of the F/F1. The F2 was a full 3-5 BHP (depending on who wrote the article) more powerful, and with the lower gearing and better midrange and top end power and higher "red-line", could thump any CB750, as Honda were then trying to compete with the mighty Suzuki GS750 (I've got one of them too) and very agile Kawasaki KZ650, both of which were capable of 125 Mph, which was at least 10 Mph faster than your wheezing, asphmatic, rotund K8 was ever capable of, ha ha!

Now get back to me right away mate, I've got more to tell you, but I want to do it in stages, so that you can grasp what I'm saying to you, ha ha! Cheers, "No Underpants" Terry.

[Sam Green Racing]

When you lot have done talking bikes on the humor board .....I don't like being dead ....and how the hell did you find out the wife's name

Sam and Linda

[Terry in Australia]

Well Sammy, when you write something, even if it's a joke, then a little research goes a long way. (you really should put a padlock on your letter box mate.......)

Now, if Eldy (or "#2" as I'll refer to him from this day forward) was to do some similar research before whacking away on his long suffering keyboard, he wouldn't leave himself open to my barbs, but then again, where's the fun in that? Ha ha, Cheers, Terry.

[eldar]

Oh terry, who misled you? Did you read some backwoods book? What is your redline anyways? The k8 is virtually the same as the f2 and 3 the main diff with the f3 is the larger valves and thats about it.

Oh dear. Are you suffering from overweight syndrome from having something even more rotund than the k8? Of course the K8 was capable of hitting the 120 mark, switch to the f gearing and it would probably match. Of course it may be slightly slower but then it wont pee on my leg either! Oh did I mention, the mighty K8 does not spring oil leaks? Oh sure I had to replace my tach seal but thats small peanuts.

I can smell the K8 envy all the way here! Ewe gotta get over it!

[Terry in Australia]

Oh terry, who misled you? Did you read some backwoods book? What is your redline anyways? The k8 is virtually the same as the f2 and 3 the main diff with the f3 is the larger valves and thats about it.

Oh dear. Are you suffering from overweight syndrome from having something even more rotund than the k8? Of course the K8 was capable of hitting the 120 mark, switch to the f gearing and it would probably match. Of course it may be slightly slower but then it wont pee on my leg either! Oh did I mention, the mighty K8 does not spring oil leaks? Oh sure I had to replace my tach seal but thats small peanuts.

I can smell the K8 envy all the way here! Ewe gotta get over it!

Hey good one Eldy, I love to read your posts, particularly if I've been eating a lot of cheese, for some reason or other I seem to be able to pass pretty much anything after reading your words, it's almost like a magical optical laxative, ha ha!

Now I can tell you authoritively that the K8 engine spec is much closer to the earlier F0/F1 than the F2/F3, the main differences being that the F2/F3 had a different combustion chamber shape, higher domed pistons, larger valves set at a slightly different angle, sportier camshaft, heavier valve springs, heavy duty camchain, stronger rods, etc etc etc. I won't go on about the differences with the clutch and gearbox, but you get the idea, yeah? If you're not sure mate, just have a look at the parts manual for both bikes and you'll see.

The F2/F3's were heavier mainly due to the triple disc brakes, but they were still much faster than any of their peers, and the advantages of much better handling and braking (the F2/F3 was by far the best handling CB750, earning it's "Super Sports" title as you're possibly aware) were obvious, to all but the most uninformed amongst us.

Sadly, if not well maintained from new, the F2/F3 could show advanced signs of wear due to the radical cam design and probably overly heavy valve springs, and the tops of the valve stems copped a beating, causing them to "mushroom", while it was also possible for the valve guides to come loose, and in extreme cases, some engines broke camchains and "dropped a valve" which of course was disasterous. My first F2 that I bought in 1997 was a well cared for example that was a "one owner" and was in perfect condition with 50,000 miles up, I got to speak to the Po and he'd never had the thing apart in the 20 years he'd owned it until he traded it on a new ST1100, for 1500 bucks it was a bargain, and I sold it to finance my Suzuki GS1000S a couple of years later for 3300.

By contrast, my current F2 was an Ebay 500 buck POS that I only bought for the engine and foolishly restored at great expense, as only the engine (once rebuilt) frame, forks and wheels were useable, so everything else came from Ebay in the USA, plus I got a lot of help with parts from Mike Rieck and Sean Condon. Sadly I used the wrong case sealant (don't use Loctite, it's crap) hence the leak, but this is not common of the marque, my first one didn't leak at all. Still, it was a learning experience and I made some great friends, and learned a lot about my bike, and the perils of restoration.   

Regardless, I've never been a K7/K8 fan, while the engines can easily be made to go fast, they're otherwise just such a homely device compared to the K0-K6, I just couldn't love one, so if you're smelling something, check the soles of your boots mate, maybe you stepped in some #2? Ha ha, cheers, Terry.

[eldar]

Well if I steped in #2, it must have been left by a k1-6! That would be the only explanation! Even the k1-6 are envious of the K8! boy if you can like the k8 how did you learn to like the slabs called the f2/3? Nothing for dynamics there at all! I will give some points to the f3 front brakes but not the back. My drum works as good as any disk! I can feather just as well and lock whenever I want!

Oh well, everything is an aquired taste. I could learn to love a k1-6 if I put on the k8 seat and tank and got rid of the ungodly horrid k1-6 front fender!  one thing about the valve train though, unless I went with a really beef cam, I could keep my stock set up unless they were badly worn, so sayeth the headmaster!

You should clean up after your f2, that may have been what I stepped in!