Yeah mate, due to our useless, incompetent government of the last 5 years, we've had a massive influx of illegal immigrants who fly into Indonesia from Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan etc, then get on a leaky old fishing boat and sail to Christmas Island, where they are detained and processed for "refugee status", to be allowed into Oz.
There are currently thousands of these people sitting on Christmas Island, and over 1000 have drowned when their leaky boats sank before they were detected, usually still within Indonesian waters. (the Indon's don't give a crap about them, and are making a fortune selling their leaky old boats to the people smugglers)
Of course as soon as they arrive in Oz they breed prolifically, never get a job, and rely on the Australian tax payer to maintain them and their huge families, while they supplement their income by committing crimes and violently protest if anyone even mentions their hero, Muhammad.
The previous government was much smarter, they issued them temporary protection visas and shipped them off to Nauru, from where the majority got pissed off, and just went home. This government finally succumbed to accepting that their predecessors got it right, and have fired up the long-neglected detention centres on Nauru and Manus Island, off New Guinea.
The company I work for has been given the contract to provide the "Garrison Support" functions for Nauru, and I'll be working there as their Senior Logistics Manager. I don't know if I should be pissed off or not, the company has paid for my shiney new passport, and apparently my salary will be doubled while I'm there.
I'll initially be living in a tent, but that's no biggie after 35 years in the military, and of course the company will be feeding and clothing me and providing free medical treatment etc. The only vehicles we have there at the moment are 110cc Honda "Postie Bikes", so I better take my helmet............
There's a canteen, I'll have internet access, and I think it's a "3 weeks on, 3 weeks off" deal, so I should have plenty of time to work on my bikes and ride them, in between my trips back to Nauru. What will piss me off though is the heat, the bugs, and the boredom, but once again, after 35 years in the military, I'm kind of used to living in schidt conditions, and that pisses me off!