G'Day men, well here I am in sunny (read fcuking hot) Townsville. I'm currently making a list of things that you don't need in Townsville, as follows:
1. Hot water faucets. Hot water is unneccessary in Townsville, and anyway, hot water comes out of the COLD fcuking water faucet.
2. Shirts. Shirts are pointless in Townsville, I ironed a work shirt on Sunday night, and within 5 minutes of wearing it, it was a soggy wet bag.
3. Clothes dryers. The temperature in Townsville is hotter than the maximum setting on any clothes dryer. Fcuk it's hot.
4. Jackets. I heard a new employee whining because we didn't provide him with a work jacket. I'll be having a word to HR on Monday about their selection criteria.......
5. Brains. Brains are optional in Townsville, I'm guessing that most people were born with brains, but the soaring heat (at any time of the day or night, fcuk it's hot!) has dehydrated them to the point of non-existance, OR, they have just evolved to a brainless, but generally happy state.
6. Traffic lights. Totally unnecessary, apart from the fact that Townsville folk largely ignore them, there's really not enough traffic to warrant them.
7. Shoes. Once again, pointless, sandals are much smarter, except when Taipans bite you on the big toe in the Strand, as is a real concern here at the moment. Fcuk I hate Taipans........
Hmmnnn, I've just looked at the clock and realIsed that I'm late for my first beer so I better push off, I'll come back with some more things not needed in Townsville ideas tomorrow, when I've sobered up. Cheers, Terry.