Topic: Let it all hang out,tell us how you really feel and what pisses you off.

[Terry in Australia]

Glad that you survived mate.
There's some knob heads out there and it's much the same on the roads up here with the interstate fcukas who've headed this way to get a job at the Inpex Gas Plant.

Well, I ordered some new rims, spokes and shocks for the Postie Bike today and was feeling rather pleased with myself.
Then when I got home tonight, the missus dropped a heap of bills in my lap that have to paid.
Car rego, trailer rego, power bill, water bill, phone bill, rates bill, garbage collection bill and there's another fcuking bill that I can't remember.

So at the moment, I'm having a cold beer and trying to think about how to weazel my way out of this and that's pissing me off. 

Yeah, don't pay 'em Mick, you won't be the first Darwin-ite to drive an unregistered car, I thought unregistered cars were mandatory in the NT? Maybe you should "Bronze Up" when the wallopers turn up to collect the money, that sounds like a good way to keep your money in the old sky rocket?

[trueblue]

Well, we had an interesting one today, there was a code called down the detention unit.  I was busy at first and couldn't attend immediately.  By the time I got there everyone was kitted up in their sperm suits and I'm scratching my head trying to figure out what the #$%* was going on.  All I can say is thank #$%* I was held up by a couple of minutes, they were kitted up to do a cell extraction because a crim had bronzed up (painted himself in #$%*) and was trying to hang himself with a torn up bed sheet.  I can definitely say I was glad to be a spectator in that one. 

Ha ha, fcuk that Andrew, if someone deliberately covers themselves in schist and tries to hang themselves I say let them go, I'd even loan them a decent rope!

That's my thoughts exactly, if they are #$%*ed up enough to do something like that then I reckon we should just let them have at it.  Unfortunately the bleeding hearts of the world don't see it quite the same.  I had one say to me a few weeks back "He's a nice guy, he just made a few bad choices."  Unfortunately I'm not allowed to then turn around and say that one of those "bad choices" involved raping his ex-girlfriend then stabbing her 45 times.  Yeah let's just call them bad choices.  The bleeding hearts are the worst part of the job and unfortunately a lot of them wear the same uniform as the rest of us.   

[Terry in Australia]

Yeah mate, when I buy my first private jail you can be my warden, and we'll share that rope around until the only crims left are the poor buggers who got done for speeding or bronzing up to keep the bill collectors at bay....

[petercb750]

Wow Tez, glad you dodged one mate. When I was commuting 160km return I too had a couple of moments and saw lots of near misses....it pissed me off.

Hey Andrew.....just when you thought you'd seen it all...

Mick....tell 'em to get fkd and if they want their money to come and get it and then let charlie loose on them, that'll piss them off 

[mick7504]

I haven't heard about getting "Bronzed Up" before.
Years ago, a bloke was giving me mate a hard time at the pub, so the ol' mate went out to carpark after dark and found this fellas TC Cortina that had the lift up door handles.

So he dropped his daks and laid a turd on a piece of newspaper and then packed the door handle with this freshly laid googy.


Well the Cortina owner left the pub and went to open the car door and suddenly, there was some rather unsavory language coming from that general direction.
In the meantime, we were belly aching with tears streaming from laughing.
Does that mean that Cortina owner got his finger nails Bronzed Up? 

[Terry in Australia]

Wow Tez, glad you dodged one mate. When I was commuting 160km return I too had a couple of moments and saw lots of near misses....it pissed me off.

Hey Andrew.....just when you thought you'd seen it all...

Mick....tell 'em to get fkd and if they want their money to come and get it and then let charlie loose on them, that'll piss them off 

Thanks Pete, when I was the logistics manager at Pucka-fcuking-punyal for 5 years I did a shade over 1000 Klicks a week in the trusty old Hilux/Ssanyongong/Falcoon.

I saw some amazing acts of stupidity, like the trucker who set fire to his own load of hay by throwing a burning butt out da window, to the young soldier who rolled his mate's car 11 times and end for ended it several times too.

His mate had just bought the car and asked him to drive it back to Pucka because he was worried about it getting scratched in the long term car park at Tulla.......

I've driven from Melbourne to Darwin then on to Gove a couple of times, up to FNQ a few times more (only flown across to Perth, to my shame) and I just love driving. I wonder how many Klicks I've clocked up in nearly 40 years?

Not knowing pisses me off.......

[Terry in Australia]

Here's another adventure that happened yesterday that I wasn't even aware of until I listened to the news on my way in this morning, the hotel I'm staying at received a fcuking bomb threat last night! Management decided not to evacuate the guests, so as not to alarm them. Being alarmed would probably piss me off.........

[mrbreeze]

I'd be more pissed if I got blown up!

[mick7504]

Glad that you survived mate.
There's some knob heads out there and it's much the same on the roads up here with the interstate fcukas who've headed this way to get a job at the Inpex Gas Plant.

Well, I ordered some new rims, spokes and shocks for the Postie Bike today and was feeling rather pleased with myself.
Then when I got home tonight, the missus dropped a heap of bills in my lap that have to paid.
Car rego, trailer rego, power bill, water bill, phone bill, rates bill, garbage collection bill and there's another fcuking bill that I can't remember.

So at the moment, I'm having a cold beer and trying to think about how to weazel my way out of this and that's pissing me off. 

Yeah, don't pay 'em Mick, you won't be the first Darwin-ite to drive an unregistered car, I thought unregistered cars were mandatory in the NT? Maybe you should "Bronze Up" when the wallopers turn up to collect the money, that sounds like a good way to keep your money in the old sky rocket?

Yeah the good ol' days mate.
Times are tough now when you can't bribe a copper with a carton of cold beer anymore. 

[Don R]

 I was rebuilding the wheels on the rougher of the two cb400's tonight. I dismounted the old tires, cut the spokes and am ready to soda blast the hubs. If anyone runs into the guy that said they always stored it inside kick him in the nuts for me.
 I won $250 worth of contingency Auto Meter gauges racing, I get to pick off the web site. Dang they have dozens of styles, stepper motor gauges, antique ones. I can't even find the plain old mechanical ones with the 1/8" pipe thread on the back. (oil press, cb750 and fuel pressure, dragster) I might have to go to the speed shop to get part numbers.

[mick7504]

I just Googled "Bronze Up" out of curiosity and I reckon that I get the idea now. 
FFFFAAAARRRKKK

The glorious act of coating yourself in your own excrement. This can be done by using a brush, paper or simply just your hands. It can be done either in anger to shock or annoy people or just for plain old fun.

Adrian got angry when he seen someone pushing in line at the canteen. He proceeded to bronze up on the spot and was at the front of the line in no time!

Adrian likes men and invites other fags around to have a group bronzing up session in his kitchen.

[petercb750]

Here's another adventure that happened yesterday that I wasn't even aware of until I listened to the news on my way in this morning, the hotel I'm staying at received a fcuking bomb threat last night! Management decided not to evacuate the guests, so as not to alarm them. Being alarmed would probably piss me off.........

Not as much as being blown up....wtf were they thinking 

[Terry in Australia]

Mental note to Terry, stay the fcuk away from Adrian's kitchen.......

[Terry in Australia]

Oh, and I'm pissed that my new "Pimp Mobile" was delivered today, and I have to wait until tomorrow night to see it.

[trueblue]

It's in the #$%*ing air at the moment.  I had one crim slash up twice on me today and another attempt to hang himself.  I nearly called in sick considering it is my birthday, but I thought "#$%* it, I'll pretend to be dedicated."  I got to work and found I had been posted to the crisis wards, then it started about an hour into my shift and continued for the next 11 hours.  I had one crim trying to incite the rest of them to play up, the #$%*tard was all big and tough when he was behind a closed door but turned to jelly when we opened it up.  Then just after lunch he hung a bedsheet over his #$%*house door and "tried" to hang himself.  Also known as he wrapped it round his neck a couple of times and stood there till we took it off him, it wasn't even tight.  Then the "hanger" convinced the other #$%*tard to cut himself.  The idiot got his fingernail and drove it into his forearm and then smeared blood all over his cell.  Then after he got patched up, some #$%*head in master control got on the intercom and set him off again.  Blood everywhere, again.  I was #$%*ing glad to walk out of the place tonight.  Most days I enjoy my work, but today was a little chalanging to say the least, mainly because the super wouldn't allow us to kit up, grab the shield and slam the #$%*tard into the back wall of the cell, then into the ground.  It would have relieved the stress a little. 

[Terry in Australia]

Oh well, happy birthday anyway, Mr Z!

[petercb750]

Fark....ummm....happy birthday Andrew. 
You've got a tough gig there. ....makes my little pissy job look even pissier.

[mick7504]

Yeah, Happy Birthday Andrew.
Fcuk mate, after reading that, a Jims Mowing Franchise is starting to sound good. 

[trueblue]

Oh well, happy birthday anyway, Mr Z!

Thanks Terry,

Fark....ummm....happy birthday Andrew. 
You've got a tough gig there. ....makes my little pissy job look even pissier.

Thanks mate, most days it is actually a really good job, just some days it tries your patience more than others.  Today was one of those days, and once it is over and you get to wind down, more often than not you laugh about it.

Yeah, Happy Birthday Andrew.
Fcuk mate, after reading that, a Jims Mowing Franchise is starting to sound good. 

Thanks Mick, I couldn't go back to working 5 days a week, I enjoy the time off too much. 

[vfourfreak]

It's in the #$%*ing air at the moment.  I had one crim slash up twice on me today and another attempt to hang himself.  I nearly called in sick considering it is my birthday, but I thought "#$%* it, I'll pretend to be dedicated."  I got to work and found I had been posted to the crisis wards, then it started about an hour into my shift and continued for the next 11 hours.  I had one crim trying to incite the rest of them to play up, the #$%*tard was all big and tough when he was behind a closed door but turned to jelly when we opened it up.  Then just after lunch he hung a bedsheet over his #$%*house door and "tried" to hang himself.  Also known as he wrapped it round his neck a couple of times and stood there till we took it off him, it wasn't even tight.  Then the "hanger" convinced the other #$%*tard to cut himself.  The idiot got his fingernail and drove it into his forearm and then smeared blood all over his cell.  Then after he got patched up, some #$%*head in master control got on the intercom and set him off again.  Blood everywhere, again.  I was #$%*ing glad to walk out of the place tonight.  Most days I enjoy my work, but today was a little chalanging to say the least, mainly because the super wouldn't allow us to kit up, grab the shield and slam the #$%*tard into the back wall of the cell, then into the ground.  It would have relieved the stress a little. 

Sorry I'm late a bit : Happy birthday Andrew. Tough job by the sounds of it.

Kev

[vfourfreak]

Some cnut of a VW Passat 2.0 l diesel owner parked his motor in my right ear while I was sleeping a night or two ago.

 Good news for him, bad news for me it's morphed into a Scania truck - with trailer. Pain is unbearable. You win, take your prize and go.

Kev

[Terry in Australia]

That's just karma for your drunken 2am RC30 antics Kev, "Let he who hath not sinned, cast the first stone". Suck it up mate, and it will pass.....

[bear]

Happy birthday mate

Chears,
Brian

[Retro Rocket]

Happy Birthday Andrew...

[mick7504]

Another week gone and another week of problem solving which was positive.
The boss bought a six pack into my office at 3 thirty and we demolished them.
So here I am thinking how good is this while getting paid to drink beer with the General Manager and the weekend is almost here.

 But as fcuking usual, that was short lived when the fcuking phone rang.
Now it's off to work tomorrow morning to sort out a triviality that has become a fcuking mountain of a problem for one of our unenterprising employees.

FCUK. It's enough to make a bloke wanna Bronze Up and that pisses me off.