Author Topic: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning  (Read 1047 times)

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Offline roy1

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Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« on: August 02, 2012, 04:10:12 AM »
Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife.
Tearfully she explained, "It's the druggist. He insulted me terribly
this morning on the phone. I had to call multiple times before he
would even answer the phone."

Immediately, the husband drove downtown to confront the druggist and
demand an apology.

Before he could say more than a word or two, the druggist told him,
"Now, just a minute, listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm
failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast
and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I'd locked the house
with both House and car keys inside and had to break a window to get
my keys. "Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket.
Later, when I was about three blocks from the store, I had a flat
tire." "When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting
for me to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on these
people, all the time The darn phone was ringing off the hook."

He continued, "Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash
register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I
had to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels and the
phone was still ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open
cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a
bunch of perfume bottles on it. Half of them hit the floor and broke."

"Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally
got back to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use
a Rectal thermometer.

And believe me mister, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her."




`
`



Freedom is not Free.

"When the sun's comin' up,
I got cakes on the griddle.
Life ain't nothin' but a funny funny riddle,
Thank God I'm a Country Boy!"

Offline Jerry Rxman Griffin aka MuthaF'er

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2012, 09:45:42 AM »
LMAO. Somewhat typical start of the day in many respects. Sounds like he might have had a hangover to start his day.  ;)

Now as far as rectal thermometers go, do you know what the difference is between a rectal thermometer and an oral thermometer? Give me some guesses and I'll let you know.
As of today 3/13/2012 my original owner 75 CB750F has made it through 3 wives, er EX-wives. Free at last.  ;-)

Offline scottly

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2012, 11:46:45 AM »
One tastes bad! :P
(I had actually wondered about this before, and after you mentioned it, compared them. I think I know the difference, but I won't spoil the fun.)
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rhos1355

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #3 on: August 03, 2012, 04:56:14 AM »
Hint: if it's glass, don't shove it up your ass.

usually a good rule of thumb...............well for anything, really.

Offline Jerry Rxman Griffin aka MuthaF'er

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #4 on: August 03, 2012, 10:07:36 AM »
I can always count on Scottly! The difference is the taste  ;D (or so they tell me).

Actually, the "other" difference is the size of the bulb. Ass thermos are glass too unless they are digital.
As of today 3/13/2012 my original owner 75 CB750F has made it through 3 wives, er EX-wives. Free at last.  ;-)

Offline scottly

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #5 on: August 03, 2012, 07:50:39 PM »
Oops, I was wrong (other than the taste  ::)). I thought the difference was the temperature range: the rectal reads from 94 to 108, while the oral reads from 96 to 106.
Don't fix it if it ain't broke!
Helmets save brains. Always wear one and ride like everyone is trying to kill you....

Offline Jerry Rxman Griffin aka MuthaF'er

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #6 on: August 03, 2012, 11:37:37 PM »
Now we're gettin WAY too technical. I'm trying to retire and I'm trying to forget WAY more than I learned. Motorcycle mechanics has gotten to be much more fun! Doesn't pay #$%* however, er doesn't pay rectal thermometer taste however  ;D

AZ, huh?! Gonna be in Page Fr/Sat. Wanna parT? 
As of today 3/13/2012 my original owner 75 CB750F has made it through 3 wives, er EX-wives. Free at last.  ;-)

Offline DustyRags

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #7 on: August 04, 2012, 12:22:19 PM »
Pshsh, the difference is obviously in the use sequence.

Oral: Wash, then use.
Rectal: use then wash.

It's kinda like the old chestnut about the difference between the surgeon and the mechanic- the doctor washes hands *after* the bathroom!  ;D
1976 CB550K- sold
2005 Kawasaki Vulcan 500- sold
2000 CB750 Nighthawk - sold
1975 XL350 - crashed
2004 Suzuki Vstrom 650 - sold

Offline scottly

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Re: Pharmacist's Mondy Morning
« Reply #8 on: August 04, 2012, 08:32:56 PM »

AZ, huh?! Gonna be in Page Fr/Sat. Wanna parT?
Shoot, after all the "Drainage and Road improvements" going on in front of my shop, I've been afraid to try and get my bike out and up onto the road surface without high-centering it or dumping it, for over 3 weeks now. >:( No wonder I've been so crabby lately...
Don't fix it if it ain't broke!
Helmets save brains. Always wear one and ride like everyone is trying to kill you....