Author Topic: Quotes of enlightenment (Post Yours) (Read 50133 times)

spotty · « **Reply #375 on:** September 19, 2018, 10:46:37 PM »

Quote from: jgger on September 19, 2018, 10:03:27 PM

WC was the best, the one I liked was his mother In law was cranking at him one morning,
She says"why, you're drunk"
He says "yes, yes I am. And you're crazy. Tomorrow I'll be sober and you , you will be crazy for the rest of your life!"

i always thought it was "you'll still be ugly ", both work though

Greaser Greg · « **Reply #376 on:** October 01, 2018, 06:00:25 AM »

No one knows what goes on in the mind of a toddler.
Nobody knows what wha-ha-ha means.
How do you get what you want? You ask for it.

Gurp · « **Reply #377 on:** December 21, 2018, 10:59:56 AM »

The highest seniority always does the least work. Despite what they say.

vfourfreak · « **Reply #378 on:** December 21, 2018, 11:06:33 AM »

Procrastination is the thief of time

spotty · « **Reply #379 on:** December 21, 2018, 01:45:11 PM »

All the world loves a clown until you have to work with one

OldSchool_IsCool · « **Reply #380 on:** December 21, 2018, 03:01:09 PM »

There is no education in the second kick of a mule.

HondaMan · « **Reply #381 on:** January 03, 2019, 08:43:05 PM »

If that 'truth' about you hurt, you probably just learned something useful.

dave500 · « **Reply #382 on:** January 04, 2019, 02:14:07 AM »

if I had my time over id be the luckiest man on earth! dave500 2019.

markb · « **Reply #383 on:** January 04, 2019, 07:39:09 AM »

Sometimes it's better to be lucky than smart.

HondaMan · « **Reply #384 on:** January 04, 2019, 06:22:04 PM »

Quote from: markb on January 04, 2019, 07:39:09 AM

Sometimes it's better to be lucky than smart.

Mostly!

05c50 · « **Reply #385 on:** January 05, 2019, 06:46:25 AM »

Never enter into a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.

.........Paul

754 · « **Reply #386 on:** January 05, 2019, 11:31:52 AM »

This one from me...
It's not how fast I take the corners, it how many I get to ride in the day.....

Gurp · « **Reply #387 on:** January 06, 2019, 06:22:18 PM »

My first boxing coach told me "boxing is like swimming you cant do it without getting wet. You dont have to do a dam cannonball into the pool. MOVE YOUR HEAD SOMETIMES"
Never was a elusive fighter, I've always been the banger.

Don R · « **Reply #388 on:** January 07, 2019, 05:07:41 PM »

I couldn't understand why the baseball kept getting bigger, then it hit me.

spotty · « **Reply #389 on:** January 07, 2019, 06:44:24 PM »

bollocks to this, i'm off to the pub

Don R · « **Reply #390 on:** January 09, 2019, 03:08:41 PM »

I thought the dryer made my clothes smaller, turns out it was the refrigerator!

OldSchool_IsCool · « **Reply #391 on:** January 09, 2019, 03:56:52 PM »

^^like^^

Don R · « **Reply #392 on:** January 10, 2019, 12:27:21 PM »

I know a guy addicted to brake fluid, but it's OK he can stop anytime.

I'm reading a book about anti gravity, I can't put it down.

ken65 · « **Reply #393 on:** January 11, 2019, 01:30:57 AM »

If I saved all the money I've spent on beer over the years, I'd spend it on beer.

dave500 · « **Reply #394 on:** January 11, 2019, 03:39:50 AM »

ill second that,and double it!your shout!

ken65 · « **Reply #395 on:** January 11, 2019, 04:42:40 AM »

hehe, Dave old mate. I'd love to shout you a big sesh.. Problem is , I live carton to carton.
Once I went nearly two days without a beer. Nearly ruined my life. Even questioned god.
But what doesnt kill ya makes you stronger, thats right isn't it?

Don R · « **Reply #396 on:** January 14, 2019, 09:34:37 AM »

I didn't like my beard at first, then it grew on me.

70CB750 · « **Reply #397 on:** January 14, 2019, 10:23:16 AM »

If all the girls attending the Yale prom were laid end to end, I wouldn't be at all surprised.

70CB750 · « **Reply #398 on:** January 14, 2019, 10:24:09 AM »

Tell them I was too f**king busy - or vice versa.

70CB750 · « **Reply #399 on:** January 15, 2019, 04:16:37 AM »

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

News:

Author Topic: Quotes of enlightenment (Post Yours) (Read 50133 times)

ken65

ken65