Author Topic: For our female members  (Read 2289 times)

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Offline nickjtc

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For our female members
« on: November 01, 2006, 10:44:40 AM »
1. Martha's Way
Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice-cream drips.

The Real Woman's Way
Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for God's sake. You are probably lying on the couch with your feet up eating it anyway.
 
2. Martha's Way
To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

The Real Woman's Way
Buy packets of instant potatoes and keep them in the cupboard for up to a year.
 
3. Martha's Way
When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking tin, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

The Real Woman's Way
The grocery store sells cakes. They even do decorated versions.       

4.Martha's Way
If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it's still cooking, drop in a potato slice.

The Real Woman's Way
If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's tough sh*t. Please recite with me the Real Woman's motto: "I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad it tastes." 

5. Martha's Way
Wrap celery in aluminium foil when putting in the refrigerator and it will keep for weeks

The Real Woman's Way
It could keep forever. Who eats it? 
 
6. Martha's Way
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

The Real Woman's Way
Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and drop it in 8 ounces of vodka. Drink the vodka. You might still have the headache, but you wont give a sh*t. 
 
7. Martha's Way
If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

The Real Woman's Way
Why do I have a man? 
 
8. Martha's Way
Freeze leftover wine into ice cubes for future use in casseroles

The Real Woman's Way
Left over wine???? Hello!!!!!
Nick J. Member #3247

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Offline Jonesy

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #1 on: November 01, 2006, 06:34:55 PM »
LOL.. My wife loved this one. She hates Martha with a passion.
"Every time I start thinking the world is all bad, then I start seeing people out there having a good time on motorcycles; it makes me take another look." -Steve McQueen

Offline nickjtc

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #2 on: November 01, 2006, 07:16:15 PM »
LOL.. My wife loved this one. She hates Martha with a passion.

Don't we all? Another classic case of a celebrity falling into a pile of sh*t (getting busted and going to clink) and coming out smelling of roses.
Nick J. Member #3247

2008 Triumph Tiger 1050
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"That which does not kill us reminds us to wear proper motorcycle clothing...."

Offline angeldeville

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #3 on: November 01, 2006, 07:30:10 PM »
*no hippeis were harmed in the telling of this joke*
76' cb750f custom
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and enough parts to build about 6-7 more bikes

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #4 on: November 01, 2006, 10:35:24 PM »
If those are true they are pretty useful tips, I'll have to try some of them


RKS
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Offline ic455

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #5 on: November 01, 2006, 11:43:23 PM »
If those are true they are pretty useful tips, I'll have to try some of them


RKS

You're starting to scare me  :P

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #6 on: November 02, 2006, 12:12:08 AM »
Yo, I'm cheap, any way to make things last longer is good in my book especially food

Whats wrong with that?
RKS
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Offline Klark Kent

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #7 on: November 02, 2006, 07:53:31 AM »
yeah that marshmallow in the bottom of the cone trick is going to really stretch those grocery bux. Ive also noticed that your cakes have had a lot of unseemly white stuff on them lately, and im sure you already have an ice cube tray of white zinfindel ready to go in. 

uhhhh where are the ummmm FEMALES we were promised???

is snip really it?
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Offline Rsnip988

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #8 on: November 02, 2006, 09:31:38 AM »
well i was refering to the tinfoil celery and aapple in potato bag to keep them a littel longer but ok,

I dont drink no no wine cubes for me...  IC can have them..

and no I am not it..

RKS
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1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish

Offline ic455

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #9 on: November 02, 2006, 02:17:04 PM »
well i was refering to the tinfoil celery and aapple in potato bag to keep them a littel longer but ok,

I dont drink no no wine cubes for me...  IC can have them..

and no I am not it..

RKS

prefer Jack Daniels ice cubes, myself

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #10 on: November 02, 2006, 08:51:33 PM »
I didnt think Jack would freeze considering the freezing temp of ethanol


RKS
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1976 CB750 K6 Full

1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish

Offline ic455

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #11 on: November 02, 2006, 10:52:37 PM »
I didnt think Jack would freeze considering the freezing temp of ethanol


RKS

exactly

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #12 on: November 02, 2006, 10:56:27 PM »
i figured you were trying to trick me, I could make you some jack cubes though... drop an ice tray of Jack almost into some of our liquid Nitrogen and we'll see what happens


hmmmm, i dont know if it would be edible/drinkable  but it couldnt hurt to find out....

anyone want to be a guinee pig?


RKS
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1976 CB750 K6 Full

1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish

Offline ic455

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #13 on: November 02, 2006, 11:00:16 PM »
i figured you were trying to trick me, I could make you some jack cubes though... drop an ice tray of Jack almost into some of our liquid Nitrogen and we'll see what happens


hmmmm, i dont know if it would be edible/drinkable  but it couldnt hurt to find out....

anyone want to be a guinee pig?


RKS

I'd be curious as to the results.....man, this doesn't have anything to do with the thread ;)

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #14 on: November 02, 2006, 11:10:42 PM »
well females have trouble following a logical conversation so this might make sense to them...


oops adn i putting my foot in my mouth again?

oh well
RKS
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1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish

Ebrandon

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #15 on: November 03, 2006, 06:49:32 AM »
Snip-

your thinking of the pierre thread, and it's not your foot.  ;)

Offline Klark Kent

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #16 on: November 03, 2006, 07:17:16 AM »
theres that feminine touch we were missing.  thanks EB
-KK
-KK

75 CB550k
76 Moto Guzzi 850T-3FB LAPD- sold
95 KLR650
www.blindpilotmovie.com

download the shop manual:
http://forums.sohc4.net/index.php?topic=17788.0
you'll feel better.

listen to your spark plugs:
http://www.4secondsflat.com/Spark_plug_reading.html

Offline Rushoid

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #17 on: November 03, 2006, 09:26:20 AM »
Snip-

your thinking of the pierre thread, and it's not your foot.  ;)


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Offline Rsnip988

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Re: For our female members
« Reply #18 on: November 06, 2006, 10:44:00 PM »
I am not sure what that means but if they think its funny ok, I'm ready for a nap  too many 24 hour stints without sleep are messing up my memory


RKS
R.K.S.

1976 CB750 K6 Full

1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish