Author Topic: Dear Tech Support....  (Read 1863 times)

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Offline nickjtc

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Dear Tech Support....
« on: November 15, 2006, 04:21:49 PM »
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3 , Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 .

Please help!

Thanks,
Troubled User.....

REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0  to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed to run everything! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not
allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child
Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the
situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to
alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! because
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance .
Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep
3.0 , Cook It 1.5 ! and Do Bills 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5..0!

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short
Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause
irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,
Tech Support
Nick J. Member #3247

2008 Triumph Tiger 1050
1977 Suzuki GS750

"That which does not kill us reminds us to wear proper motorcycle clothing...."

Offline Bob Wessner

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #1 on: November 15, 2006, 04:24:15 PM »
That is hilarious!! ;D ;D ;D
We'll all be someone else's PO some day.

Offline mennedy

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2006, 09:32:14 AM »
Where was this analysis in 1972?

Oh, I forgot, we were on the old manual systems then!
Time is short!

Offline ElCheapo

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #3 on: November 18, 2006, 12:25:52 PM »
There are many expansion modules for the southern folks

Cheap Beer 3.1
Sexy Cousin 2.1
Trailer Trash 9.5
Misc Lawn Ornaments 1.2 (never needed to up grade)
Stationary Skool Bus 2.5
Rusty Truck 1.01 (Also never upgraded)

 ;D ;D ;D
Contact me for affordable rotor drilling services at $55 each rotor. Same day service on CB750/CB500/CB550 rotors. Next day on everything else.

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #4 on: November 19, 2006, 11:42:30 AM »
sWEET i JUST GOT THE wIFE 1.0 UPGRADE

RKS
R.K.S.

1976 CB750 K6 Full

1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish

Offline Peterbylt

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #5 on: November 20, 2006, 01:00:48 AM »
I just went from Girlfriend 11.5 to Wife 2.0
1975 550F SuperSport
1975 GL1000 Goldwing
1979 CM400A Hondamatic
1981 GL1100 Goldwing
1985 CMX250C Rebel

Offline ElCheapo

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #6 on: November 20, 2006, 10:47:37 PM »
sWEET i JUST GOT THE wIFE 1.0 UPGRADE

RKS

Don't mix that with Wives sister 2.5  :D ;D Or Cheap Beer 1.1  8) :D
Contact me for affordable rotor drilling services at $55 each rotor. Same day service on CB750/CB500/CB550 rotors. Next day on everything else.

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2006, 11:26:48 PM »
hmmmm she doesnt have a sister and i dont drink so I think I'm sagfe there EC

RKS
R.K.S.

1976 CB750 K6 Full

1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish

TheGenuineThing

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #8 on: November 21, 2006, 02:38:44 PM »
Hmm, that's not fair.  Where can we women get upgrades for our Husband 1.0?  I'd like Upgrade 2.5 "Conversation that doesn't take place with Biker Build-Off on in the background."  :D ;D ;) :)

Offline Bob Wessner

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #9 on: November 21, 2006, 03:45:53 PM »
Hmm, that's not fair.  Where can we women get upgrades for our Husband 1.0?  I'd like Upgrade 2.5 "Conversation that doesn't take place with Biker Build-Off on in the background."  :D ;D ;) :)

Still in BETA testing I'm afraid, lots of bugs to iron out yet. ;D
We'll all be someone else's PO some day.

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #10 on: November 22, 2006, 09:43:38 PM »
hmmm I dont know about a husband upgrade, how can yo improve perfection?


RKS
R.K.S.

1976 CB750 K6 Full

1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish

Offline mwohlenhaus

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #11 on: November 23, 2006, 06:48:08 AM »
it's getting pretty deep in here, time to put on the waders.

Offline Rsnip988

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Re: Dear Tech Support....
« Reply #12 on: November 24, 2006, 10:56:30 PM »
Should we move this to the BS thread?


RKS
R.K.S.

1976 CB750 K6 Full

1976 CB750 K6 Cafe'ish