Author Topic: Strange & Funny Tombstones  (Read 1167 times)

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Offline RevDoc

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Strange & Funny Tombstones
« on: August 17, 2016, 05:53:04 AM »
Born 1903-Died 1942
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if the
car was on the way down. It was.

******************************

In a Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery:

Here lies an Atheist
All dressed up
And no place to go.

******************************

In a London, England cemetery:

Here lies Ann Mann,
Who lived an old maid
But died an old Mann.
Dec. 8, 1767

****************************

In a Ribbesford, England, cemetery:

Anna Wallace:
The children of Israel wanted bread,
And the Lord sent them manna.
Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.

******************************

In a Ruidoso, New Mexico, cemetery:

Here lies Johnny Yeast..
Pardon me
For not rising.

******************************

In a Uniontown, Pennsylvania, cemetery:

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas
Instead of the brake.

******************************

In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery:

Here lays The Kid.
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger
But slow on the draw.

****************************

A lawyer's epitaph in England:

Sir John Strange. .
Here lies an honest lawyer,
And that is Strange.

*****************************

John Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery:

Reader, if cash thou art
In want of any,
Dig 6 feet deep;
And thou wilt find a Penny.

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In a cemetery in Hartscombe, England:

On the 22nd of June,
Jonathan Fiddle
Went out of tune.

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Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls,Vermont

Here lies the body of our Anna -
Done to death by a banana.
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low,
But the skin of the thing that made her go.

******************************

On a grave from the 1880s in Nantucket, Massachusetts:

Under the sod and under the trees,
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there's only the pod.
Pease shelled out and went to God

*****************************

In a cemetery in England:

Remember man, as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I.
As I am now, you soon will be.
Prepare yourself and follow me.

To which someone replied by writing on the tombstone:

To follow you I'll not consent
Until I know which way you went

******************************

Last add, from Boot Hill, in Tombstone, Arizona:

Here lies Lester Moore
One slug from a 44
No Les
No More
Dana

'78 CB550K--Angie
'82 CB750 Custom--Eva



As soon as you straddle a bike expect every other driver on the road to suddenly start competeing for the title "Dumbestsonofa#$%*inallNorthAmerica!!"

Offline vfourfreak

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Re: Strange & Funny Tombstones
« Reply #1 on: August 17, 2016, 02:27:37 PM »
I got to visit Lester's grave in Tombstone once. I think he excused me a chuckle or two.

I like the one by Quint in Jaws :

"Here lies the body of Mary Lee; died at the age of a hundred and three. For fifteen years she kept her virginity; not a bad record for this vicinity."

Kev

Offline 70CB750

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Re: Strange & Funny Tombstones
« Reply #2 on: August 17, 2016, 02:46:57 PM »
And hypochondriac has tombstone saying:

I told you!
Prokop
_______________
Pure Gas - find ethanol free gas station near you

I love it when parts come together.

Dorothy - my CB750
CB750K3F - The Red
Sidecar


CB900C

2006 KLR650

Offline 70CB750

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Re: Strange & Funny Tombstones
« Reply #3 on: August 17, 2016, 02:48:41 PM »
One more:

Here lies my wife
Here let her lie!
Now she is at rest
And so am I.
Prokop
_______________
Pure Gas - find ethanol free gas station near you

I love it when parts come together.

Dorothy - my CB750
CB750K3F - The Red
Sidecar


CB900C

2006 KLR650

Offline vfourfreak

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Re: Strange & Funny Tombstones
« Reply #4 on: August 17, 2016, 03:10:00 PM »
Spike Milligan in a last comedic gesture demanded the following on his tombstone :

"Duirt me leat go raibh me breoite"

It's Irish. You can Google it, but from my Classical Education I can save you some time, it translates as :

"I told you I was unwell"