Topic: Sad week

[Trevor from Warragul]

A workmate's 18 year old daughter killed herself earlier this week.  It hit home because he's around the same age as me & I have a 19 year old daughter.  His daughter had serious mental health issues for years (anorexia), and so has mine (autism & depression).  I told my daughter about the death, then told her I'd like to have her around for a lot more years, 'cause I like having her around.  Got a hug.  Made me feel a little bit better.

Cheers

Trevor

[Lostboy Steve]

A workmate's 18 year old daughter killed herself earlier this week.  It hit home because he's around the same age as me & I have a 19 year old daughter.  His daughter had serious mental health issues for years (anorexia), and so has mine (autism & depression).  I told my daughter about the death, then told her I'd like to have her around for a lot more years, 'cause I like having her around.  Got a hug.  Made me feel a little bit better.

Cheers

Trevor

That's a real shame. Sometimes, like I told a man today, you have to think about how something like that will affect the people around you. Regardless of what you think an after life is, or if you even believe there is one, the people around you need to keep living should you choose to end your own life. The man I was speaking to today has a second round of brain cancer. He was telling me that after his last surgery he didn't know his own children's names and he won't go through that again. He wants to forego this second surgery and if it gets bad enough he'll end it himself. While I understand where he's coming from, you have to think that his children would rather him forget their names (even if for good) than clean up after a suicide. I had a friend in high school who lived a few houses down from me who blew out the back of his skull... #$%*ed his entire family up. There's something for your mom to come home to after working the night shift. I know it all sounds so morbid, but sometimes a frank discussion can make all the difference. I myself struggle with depression and anxiety. It sucks. I'm also afraid to die, so no suicidal tendencies here whatsoever. Again very sad. Good luck to you.

[scrapvalue]

Love them today, tomorrow may never come. 

[754]

Lingering on while very ill , can be very hard on those around you as well..
 Lost my brother in law early this morning to cancer, as well as my brother in March..
Both of them wanted no extraordinary measures taken....when it gets near the end, its not much of a life, and you are in a world of hurt.
 My sister is exhausted, the last few months have been hell, without much rest..
 Everybody has a different threshold of how much they can take, and how long they want to continue an.....in some cases ..hopeless situation...

[BomberMann650]

Anorexia is a bad disease man.  Not that autism is an easy load to haul either.

But goddamn. The fcuked up #$%* that lays the ground work for anorexia.

It's not just someone suddenly deciding they want to be skinny.  No, not that basic, and not that selfish.
It takes months, if not years of pressure and negative influence to push a person, male or female, to the point that they just refuse to eat.

One an idea is introjected into the mind, it's awful hard to be rid of it.  Believe you me.  Mental disorders that are a culmination of outside attacks get internalized and become accepted as gospel.

This is why I hate shaming, I call out the shamers when I see it.  Caught the local cheerleaders telling one of their squad girls not to buy the food she wanted because it would make her fat.  I gave the girls a warning about who they call fat.  They probably wont get my advice for 10 years, but #$%*, I wasn't gonna enable that talk at my service counter.
Come to find out the next town over actually makes their cheerleaders follow a strict diet and nutrition plan.  Like whattheeverlovingfcuk, a school district is putting that kind of pressure on a teenager?  FcukinA. 

Fat Shaming pisses me off.  Take it from me, been called FAT and tormeted for my eating habits since I began public school.  Hell, sometimes my folks get in on the action too.  Never developed an diagnosable eating disorder, but I've been right close.  Nope, never could get myself to puke up the crud I gorge when I'm upset, and my record for a hunger strike is only 3 days.  Only until last year did the shrinks even recognize that binge eating is a symptom with or without the forced regurgitation.

But I digress.
Mental Illness sucks.
Suicide sucks.
Feeling that fcukin low about yourself because of #$%*e other people say and do is the fcukin worst.

So I challenge all you sohc-heads - being fookin kind to someone today, and tomorrow, and the day after that, every fcukin day until you die.  Be kind.  Build someone up, never tear them down.  Ka'pesh?

[NobleHops]

...

So I challenge all you sohc-heads - being fookin kind to someone today, and tomorrow, and the day after that, every fcukin day until you die.  Be kind.  Build someone up, never tear them down.

I'm in. Very sorry for your loss and sadness guys. Best wishes.

[mick7504]

What Bomber said.
Stick together, have a laugh together, and look after each other.
Life can be a real #$%* sometimes.
Condolences through this tough time Trev and also to to your mate and his family.

[74cb750]

Lingering on while very ill , can be very hard on those around you as well..
 Lost my brother in law early this morning to cancer, as well as my brother in March..
Both of them wanted no extraordinary measures taken....when it gets near the end, its not much of a life, and you are in a world of hurt.
 My sister is exhausted, the last few months have been hell, without much rest..
 Everybody has a different threshold of how much they can take, and how long they want to continue an.....in some cases ..hopeless situation...

Sometimes life can be very difficult, but having someone to lean on really does help.
Hang in there.

[Lostboy Steve]

754, very sorry to hear man. Stay well yourself! On another note, I hate slut shaming... I mean who am I to stop a girl from wanting to screw a bunch of guys? Sounds like a party to me. Or private parts shaming? The female anatomy is lovely, no matter how may differ. (Just trying to insert some levity here)

[vfourfreak]

I'll join in if I may. It does not concern me directly, but my son is implicated, so really it is close to my heart.

I taught my son some life skills at a very early age, first aid, safety awareness about electricity etc etc. Somehow, because I had worked briefly on the railways in Ireland he asked me about giving emergency signals to train drivers. At eight years old.

Roughly 8  years later, with some high jinks on a platform with a departing train, a friend of his fell down and had a leg severed by the train. My son had the sense to both apply first aid and a little while later successfully stopped an approaching train on the same track.
With help, my son was encouraged to see all this, despite the trauma he witnessed, as a success for him. He had helped.
Some months later, looking for a secure place for the evening with some mates to drink some beer and light a camp fire, they entered into the dressing rooms of disused baths by the coast in Dublin. They found the hanged body of a man with a photo of his children pinned on a beam in front of him. My son's mates ran like fcuk but my son took the man down and tried to see if there was any way to revive him. The quest was useless, far too late, no first aid skills could produce a satisfactory result.

My son has never been the same since. I'm sorry mister that you felt the need to hang yourself in Clontarf, but could you not think of what happens to the person who finds you ?

And I knew many train drivers who had to either retire early or be given some silly old job because the had been traumatised by people who sat on a rail waiting for their train because they had had enough.

Kev

[martin99]

I'm drawn to this thread. Mental health problems are always something that happens to someone else, never you. It never gets discussed enough, IMO.

Perhaps if more people talked about it, the less isolated and alone those with problems might feel, and they might just be encouraged to ask for help before they take things in their own hands.

[Lostboy Steve]

I'll join in if I may. It does not concern me directly, but my son is implicated, so really it is close to my heart.

I taught my son some life skills at a very early age, first aid, safety awareness about electricity etc etc. Somehow, because I had worked briefly on the railways in Ireland he asked me about giving emergency signals to train drivers. At eight years old.

Roughly 8  years later, with some high jinks on a platform with a departing train, a friend of his fell down and had a leg severed by the train. My son had the sense to both apply first aid and a little while later successfully stopped an approaching train on the same track.
With help, my son was encouraged to see all this, despite the trauma he witnessed, as a success for him. He had helped.
Some months later, looking for a secure place for the evening with some mates to drink some beer and light a camp fire, they entered into the dressing rooms of disused baths by the coast in Dublin. They found the hanged body of a man with a photo of his children pinned on a beam in front of him. My son's mates ran like fcuk but my son took the man down and tried to see if there was any way to revive him. The quest was useless, far too late, no first aid skills could produce a satisfactory result.

My son has never been the same since. I'm sorry mister that you felt the need to hang yourself in Clontarf, but could you not think of what happens to the person who finds you ?

And I knew many train drivers who had to either retire early or be given some silly old job because the had been traumatised by people who sat on a rail waiting for their train because they had had enough.

Kev

Yeah I have an acquaintance who is a driver for NJ transit rails and he said you'd never believe how many people get slammed by a train in a week. Pretty crazy.

[dusterdude]

I lost a co-worker yesterday,i know how you feel

Sent from my LG-D850 using Tapatalk

[ken65]

Poor bloke . All you can do is be there for him.

[chewbacca5000]

Very sorry to hear about your friend's daughter.  I know what it is like to wrestle with crushing anxiety and found myself in a free clinic last January.  They say most people can handle one major life event, but when two or more events happen at once life can become unmanageable very quickly.

That is what happened to me after my brother almost died in the hospital, and had to deal with job loss, his divorce, my uncle's divorce, and other family members dying all at once.

I went to several doctors and they told me it was anxiety, so they gave me some pills which did not help at all!  I told them I could not hold down a job like this.  I thought I was going to die from the chest pains I was experiencing.

Lucky for me a compassionate LPN asked me if I had tried taking Magnesium, and within 3 days the chest pain was gone!  I was so happy to be pain-free.  It turns out 80 percent of the population is deficient as our soil has been depleted of this mineral for some time.

Sugar, caffeine, and stress will cause deficiency fast.  I am grateful to God and that nurse as I feel much better now. 

I would google anxiety magnesium deficiency.  There is no need to suffer.  It may not be in your daughter's head, it may be in her body.

[Duke McDukiedook]

A workmate's 18 year old daughter killed herself earlier this week.  It hit home because he's around the same age as me & I have a 19 year old daughter.  His daughter had serious mental health issues for years (anorexia), and so has mine (autism & depression).  I told my daughter about the death, then told her I'd like to have her around for a lot more years, 'cause I like having her around.  Got a hug.  Made me feel a little bit better.

Cheers

Trevor

That's a real shame. Sometimes, like I told a man today, you have to think about how something like that will affect the people around you. Regardless of what you think an after life is, or if you even believe there is one, the people around you need to keep living should you choose to end your own life. The man I was speaking to today has a second round of brain cancer. He was telling me that after his last surgery he didn't know his own children's names and he won't go through that again. He wants to forego this second surgery and if it gets bad enough he'll end it himself. While I understand where he's coming from, you have to think that his children would rather him forget their names (even if for good) than clean up after a suicide. I had a friend in high school who lived a few houses down from me who blew out the back of his skull... #$%*ed his entire family up. There's something for your mom to come home to after working the night shift. I know it all sounds so morbid, but sometimes a frank discussion can make all the difference. I myself struggle with depression and anxiety. It sucks. I'm also afraid to die, so no suicidal tendencies here whatsoever. Again very sad. Good luck to you.

Exit bag. No mess.

[flybox1]

Ive had two relatives take their own lives (various mental illnesses).  It fcukd everyone around them.
Sucks, but you gotta remember the good times.
Condolences. 

[754]

On a positive note, just got back from my BIL Al,s  Celebration of Life..
Very well attended, Al requested that people should wear Hawaiian shirts, and there were at least 100 worn..never seen so many LOUD shirts....well played.
 Overall a pretty happy occasion , but of course bittersweet as well..

[Don R]

 A racing friend as a child had found her father hanging upon returning from school. The cleaning lady didn't show up that day, she was the intended finder of his body. Messed up the kid for life. I've lost a couple friends that way and had a conversation with a first responder about finding them. It leaves me without words except don't do that.

[bill440cars]

        I have a close friend, whose Daughter lost a Very Close Friend, by her taking her own life. These 2 girls were very close, they were like Sisters, then one day the friend took her car out, leaving her license, pocketbook and everything else, at home in her room, with a note. She got on the interstate and, at some point, drove off on the median and plowed into a bridge support. My Friend's Daughter was devasted, as of course the Girl's Parents were as well. My Friend worried, for some time, that his Daughter might do the same, because of her loss. And, the Girl's Parents turned their concern onto my Friend's Daughter, as they were afraid that she might have lost the will to live as well. As has been said, somehow, there has to be "Communication", to try yo slow this process up and Save Valuable Lives (All Lives Are Valuable). ALL LIVES! 

[BomberMann650]

Found this article today.

Stay Dapper.

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/us_57caf821e4b07addc412c2b1?kwp_0=230237&kwp_4=927903&kwp_1=448546