Hell Ain't So Bad
A guy from Kentucky dies and goes to Hell. He had been a horrible man
all his life. The devil puts him to work breaking up rocks with a
sledgehammer. To make it even worse, he cranks up the temperature and
humidity.
After a couple of days, the devil checks in on his victim to see if he
is suffering adequately. The devil is aghast as the Kentuckian is
happily swinging his hammer and whistling a happy tune. The devil walks
up to him and says "I don't understand this! I've turned the heat way
up, it's humid and you're crushing rocks. Why are you so happy?" The
Kentuckian, with a big smile, looks at the devil and replies, "This is
great! It reminds me of August in Lexington. Hot, humid and a good
place to work. It reminds me of home. This is fantastic!"
The devil, extremely perplexed, walks away to ponder the Kentuckian's
remarks. He then decides to drop the temperature, send down a driving
rain and torrential winds. Soon, Hell is a wet, muddy mess.
Walking in mud up to his knees with dust blowing in his eyes, the
Kentuckian is happily slogging through the mud pushing a wheelbarrow
full of crushed rocks. Again, the devil asks how he can be so happy in
such awful conditions.
The Kentuckian, with a big smile, looks at the devil and replies, "This
is great! It's just like April in Kentucky. ! It remin ds me of working
out in the yard with spring planting. It reminds me of home. This is
fantastic!"
Now the devil is completely baffled. He is more determined than ever to
make the Kentuckian suffer. He then makes the temperature plummet.
Suddenly, Hell is blanketed in feet of snow and ice. Confident that
this will finally make the Kentuckian unhappy, he checks in on him
again. He is again aghast at what he sees! the guy is dancing, singing,
and twirling his sledgehammer as he cavorts in utter glee.
"How can you be so happy? Don't you know it's 40 below zero?" screams
the devil. Jumping up and down the Kentuckian throws a snowball at the
devil and yells "Hell is frozen over!! This means the Wildcats are
going to a Bowl game!!"
