I believe a Chuck Norris thread is missing here in humor section. Here are few:
It is a little known fact that Chuck Norris did not grow his beard, but flexed his jaw and pushed the hair out.
Some kids piss their name in the snow. Chuck Norris can piss his name into concrete.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
Chuck Norris can tear a facebook page.
Chuck Norris cheated on his English test............with a calculator.
Chuck Norris beat the sun in a staring contest.
Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade you've ever tasted.
When Chuck was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is courage?" Chuck received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
Chuck Norris doesn't play "hide-and-seek." He plays "hide-and-pray-I-don't-find-you."
Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
Chuck Norris tells Simon what to do.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Chuck Norris' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd. No one fools Chuck Norris.
Giraffes were created when Chuck Norris uppercutted a horse.
Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris doesn't have good aim. His bullets just know better than to miss.
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
