. . . and the bartender says, "you can't bring that monkey in here! Get him out!"
The man protested, "he's really a well behaved monkey, and I'm a good customer here. If he causes trouble, I'll leave." The bartender reluctantly allowed the monkey to say.
The monkey was well behaved and soon captivated by the pool game close at hand. The excited monkey jumped from his bar stool and on to the pool table and, quicker than anyone could react, swallowed the cue ball. The players were outraged, the bartender was shouting, and the man with his monkey ran from the bar.
A week later, the man with his monkey returned. "I thought I told you to keep that monkey away from here!" barked the barkeep, but the man persisted. "Look, last week was a fluke. I've gone to the vet and he says the monkey was just hungry and acting a little crazy because of it. If I keep a bowl of peanuts close at hand for him to snack on, he'll be good. I promise." Again, the bartender relented.
The monkey was indeed well behaved. After a while, he begain to get agitated and a bowl of peanuts was ordered. The monkey grabbed a peanut, shoved it in his ass and pulled it out, and then ate it.
"What's he doing now?" asked a wide eyed and slightly green bartender. The man explained "Since he swallowed that cue ball last week, he always checks everything for size."
