As always, apologies if this is old news....
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER: 8 years old. Hateful little bastard. Bites.
FREE PUPPIES: ½ Cocker Spaniel, ½ sneaky neighbour's dog.
FREE PUPPIES: Mother, German Shepherd. Father, SuperDog... able to leap tall fences in a single bound.
FOUND: DIRTY SMALL WHITE DOG. Looks like a rat. Been outdoors for quite a while. Better be a reward.
HOLSTEIN COWS, NEVER BRED: Also 1 gay Holstein bull for sale.
NORDIC TRACK FOR SALE: $300 Hardly used, call Chubby.
GENUINE GEORGIA PEACHES: California grown - 89 cents lb.
WASHER & DRYER: must sell only $300 Joined nudist colony.
WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE: Worn once by mistake. Call Stephanie
ENCYCLOPAEDIA BRITTANICA: Complete set of 45 volumes. Excellent condition, $1,000 or best offer. No longer needed, got married last month, new wife knows everything