If your wife has the size tire that Honda specified, she and Honda are right.
The PSI stamped on the tire is for max load and is related to stresses that the tire can endure safely.
If you put 35 PSI in the tire and then place 1000 lbs on the bike, the tire pressure will likely be above the max rating. If the manufacturer doesn't put the rating on the tire, someone WILL put 1000 lbs on the bike and inflate the tire to 100 PSI to make it round again. Then when the tire fails, they'll blame the manufacturer for faulty tires, saying, "well, they didn't tell me I couldn't do that"!
The tire has a weight limit and at that weight limit 41 PSI is the maximum the maunufacturer has designed the tire to operate safely. Lower weights require lower tire pressure, so the tire settles onto the street and makes a bigger contact patch than it would if over inflated.
Further, if you use max tire pressure and low weight loading, the center of the tread will wear much faster than the outward edges of the tire and you'll be replacing them at much faster intervals due to "square off", also known as "chicken strips". When these last conditions exist, the bike handling changes, usually for the worse.
Any true biker would know this, of course!