Author Topic: Spanish computers  (Read 1239 times)

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Offline nickjtc

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Spanish computers
« on: July 11, 2008, 10:29:15 AM »
With apologies, as always, if it's an oldie.

A Spanish language teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine

'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.' 'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.'

A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?'

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer' should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that 'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la computadora'), because:

1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it

(THIS GETS BETTER!)

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine
('el computador '), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on
2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model

The women won.
Nick J. Member #3247

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eldar

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #1 on: July 11, 2008, 11:49:24 AM »
Oh wait!!! For the men! After you buy one, a better model comes out! ;D

Offline firecracker

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #2 on: July 11, 2008, 11:57:13 AM »
Another reason to upgrade after a few years:

The old models are only capable of playing one or two games.  You can play much more creative games with newer/younger models.

 ;D
Life is like a game of cards.  The hand you are dealt represents determinism.  The way you play it is free will.
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eldar

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #3 on: July 11, 2008, 12:50:38 PM »
U think this is swinging in favor of the guys now!
Another reason a computer is a woman. It can shut down from the smallest error!

Offline MJL

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #4 on: July 18, 2008, 06:41:31 AM »
Computers should be feminine because you have to push just the right buttons in order to get it to do what you want.
No matter how fast or how far I rode, I couldn't leave her memory behind.

Offline firecracker

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #5 on: July 18, 2008, 07:36:51 AM »
Computers can NOT be female.

Why?

Computers use logic!     :o


 ;D

Life is like a game of cards.  The hand you are dealt represents determinism.  The way you play it is free will.
  -  Jawaharal Nehru

troppo

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #6 on: July 18, 2008, 07:40:17 AM »
Computers use logic in a manner few normal men can understand.....

Sounds like a woman to me ;)

Offline cb750k7

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #7 on: July 19, 2008, 04:16:15 AM »
And you think you had it all...

Try this joke... ;D

Jewish computer.

Typical computer you are used to, such as: The cursor moves from right to left. 
It comes with two hard drives-one for fleyshedik business software and one for milchedik games. 
Instead of getting a "General Protection Fault" error, my PC now gets "Ferklempt." 
The Chanukah screen savers include "Flying Dreidels." 
The PC also shuts down automatically at sundown on Friday evenings. 
After my computer dies, I have to dispose of it within 24 hours. 
The "Start" button has been replaced with a "Let's go! I'm not getting any younger!" button. 
When disconnecting external devices from the back of my PC, I am instructed to "Remove the cable from the PC's tuchus." 
The multimedia player has been renamed to "Nu, so play my music already!" 
Internet Explorer has a spinning "Star of David" in the upper right corner. 
I hear "Hava Nagila" during startup. 
Microsoft Office now includes "A little byte of this, and a little byte of that." 
When running "scan disk," it prompts with a "You want I should fix this?"message. 
When my PC is working too hard, I occasionally hear a loud "Oy Gevalt!" 
There is a "monitor cleaning solution" from Manischewitz that advertises that it gets rid of the "schmutz und drek" on your monitor. 
After 20 minutes of no activity, my PC goes "Schloffen." 
Computer viruses can now be cured with some matzo ball chicken soup. 
The Y2K problem has been replaced by "Year 5760-5761" issues. 
If you decide not to shut down the computer in the prescribed manner, the following message appears "You should be ashamed of yourself." 
When Spell check finds and error it prompts "Is this the best you can do?"
Found real friends here !!!

troppo

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Re: Spanish computers
« Reply #8 on: July 19, 2008, 04:32:21 AM »
Well having grown up in a largely jewish neighborhood (before computers mind you) i think this is pretty bloody funny ;D ;D ;D