ha! try being 44 and being asked on the first day if i'm the prof.
"why yes young lady i am. and i'm afraid we must discuss your grades over vodka and fruit punch." 
btw: i'm convinced more than ever college is one big money-making gaff. 
I think I can better that one, I spent a (very) short time in the 80's trying to get an agricultural qualification. Specialising in the cultivation & production of wine. (Now you geddit?) But I was working nights and thought I might join the regular 'day' stream. Well the first time I entered the class, all 16-17 yr olds, they all jumped to their feet!! LOL.
One day, because of other commitments, I had to skip classes. The next day, the biology teacher, a very arrogant man, was checking the register, calling out student's names and when he got to my name he enquired where I was the previous day (this was done without him raising his head from the register). I told him and he said he wanted an excusal letter from my parents!!
I can't I said,
why not? came the brusque reply
'cos they're both dead!!
By this time the whole class was in paroxisms of giggles.
I don't think they'll ever forget the bearded 34 yr old geezer that spent a couple of weeks in their class.