Topic: I did not need to know that.....

[Inigo Montoya]

How about if I just paste it!
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=angry%20dragon

[rostosky750]

I give you "The heinz repeating ovarian cannon"..........
(not in urban dictionary yet)
You push as many baked beans down your urethra as you dare ( I was frightened so I only managed sixteen first time) and then when you come you fire out the baked beans , "hence; heinz repeating ovarian cannon" counting of baked beans afterwards is a sensible precaution as any "unfired" beans may begin to deteriorate and produce worse knob smell than usual. Best to try this one out first time when sack is full, not recommended if you have just "cracked one off by hand" as there may not be enough power left for full ejection of all beans. Caution; do not use Green beans still in the pod.

[vanillagorilla]

I give you "The heinz repeating ovarian cannon"..........
(not in urban dictionary yet)
You push as many baked beans down your urethra as you dare ( I was frightened so I only managed sixteen first time) and then when you come you fire out the baked beans , "hence; heinz repeating ovarian cannon" counting of baked beans afterwards is a sensible precaution as any "unfired" beans may begin to deteriorate and produce worse knob smell than usual. Best to try this one out first time when sack is full, not recommended if you have just "cracked one off by hand" as there may not be enough power left for full ejection of all beans. Caution; do not use Green beans still in the pod.

You MUST be joking. You didn't really, did you???

[rostosky750]

No, I didn't (sixteen really!) I don't know anyone who has either....( one would need a huge endowment for sixteen heinz baked beans but what a campfire/party trick.)
There will be someone who reads the post and thinks it a great idea and will go away and try it and probably report back with (a.) a good story of self abuse pleasure or (b.) a hospital appointment of embarrasing magnitude....either way should produce some laughs.

[ColinMc]

How about if I just paste it!
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=angry%20dragon

Garr!! Urban Dictionary is blocked at work...I NEED to know what this is! lol

[flybox1]

....and you say you want to hear these ideas set to some sick 80's hair-metal!

Check out Steel Panther.

Their song "The Shocker" comes to mind   

[peten]

this is just plain nasty...so why am i laughing so hard?

[Inigo Montoya]

Because nasty is always funny when it happens to someone else!

[rostosky750]

I was quietly hoping the "heinz repeating (self loading) ovarian cannon would indeed be tried out by someone else ,I , in all honesty cannot hope to risk this one "for the team" because I have a 12 gauge prince albert piercing in there....If I removed it first though I could actually regulate the pressure coming out much like one does when blowing a recorder with the "thumbhole" underneath that you can either leave open, half open, or closed.... I have reservations about my ability to make sure it is fully closed at the critical "sequence of bean launch imminent" moment, and would hate to have to go to the hospital myself and explain just how I came to have 11 baked beans left backing up to my bladder....and go into details concerning the analogy of pierced penises to recorders to young nurses with large breasts who may not be conversant with musical terminology and just see me as some sort of pervert that cannot just be satisfied with watching girls roll around in baked beans but has to be stupid and push some down his own johnson and then when it goes wrong ask for help...(young nurses with breasts do give me a very strong erection which would grip the beans,making removal stubborn.)

[Ryan 550k]

I was quietly hoping the "heinz repeating (self loading) ovarian cannon would indeed be tried out by someone else ,I , in all honesty cannot hope to risk this one "for the team" because I have a 12 gauge prince albert piercing in there....If I removed it first though I could actually regulate the pressure coming out much like one does when blowing a recorder with the "thumbhole" underneath that you can either leave open, half open, or closed.... I have reservations about my ability to make sure it is fully closed at the critical "sequence of bean launch imminent" moment, and would hate to have to go to the hospital myself and explain just how I came to have 11 baked beans left backing up to my bladder....and go into details concerning the analogy of pierced penises to recorders to young nurses with large breasts who may not be conversant with musical terminology and just see me as some sort of pervert that cannot just be satisfied with watching girls roll around in baked beans but has to be stupid and push some down his own johnson and then when it goes wrong ask for help...(young nurses with breasts do give me a very strong erection which would grip the beans,making removal stubborn.)

 

[rostosky750]

The hilarity of the "cannon" overcame my ability to put just one word in italics and the post went slanty.(maybe the japanese have "been" using these cannons and its affected their eyes?