Topic: Log book entries

[Stixxy]

A postal worker who drives a postal van delivering parcels all day is getting fed up with the unreliable van.
Something on it is always giving out, breaking, failing, falling off, etc.
Every day he leaves instructions in the vans log book for the maintenance guys documenting the days problems.

The final entry in the log book was: “Engine overheating. Please remove radiator cap and install a new van.”

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Log book entry by a rookie F-16 pilot: Unfamiliar noise coming from engine. Please check.

Entry by mechanic: Ran engine for 3 hours. Sound now familiar.



Stixxy

[Sam Lop]

Pilot: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
Maintenance: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

Pilot: Something loose in cockpit.
Maintenance: Something tightened in cockpit.

Pilot: Dead bugs on windshield.
Maintenance: Live bugs on back-order.

Pilot: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute
  descent.
Maintenance: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

Pilot: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
Maintenance: Evidence removed.

Pilot: Suspected crack in windshield.
Maintenance: Suspect you're right.

Pilot: Number 3 engine missing.
Maintenance: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

Pilot: Aircraft handles funny.
Maintenance: Aircraft warned to: straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

Pilot: Target radar hums.
Maintenance: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

Pilot: Mouse in cockpit.
Maintenance: Cat installed.

Pilot: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget
  pounding on something with a hammer.
Maintenance: Took hammer away from midget