Author Topic: Seller's famous last words! (Read 10851 times)

zzpete · « **Reply #50 on:** November 24, 2010, 08:03:30 PM »

P.O. "Definitions"

Clean Title: Left it in his pants pocket when he did the wash.

Has Title: HE calls it "Sir Smokes A Lot"

Needs Electrical Work: It started smokin so he pulls the third new battery in the last month and puts an ad on craigslist!

Rare Bike: A sure clue that the bike is "WELL DONE"

Needs Nothing: Sure it needs nothing if you don't mind riding a piece of CRAP!

Needs TLC: TLC meaning "tender loving CASH"

Bike has been in the family since new: Yeah the Manson family!

And the band played on!!!

SOHC Digger · « **Reply #51 on:** November 24, 2010, 08:19:50 PM »

More P.O. defenitions:

Recently - sometime between the manufacture date and now

Fast - will beat a three-year-old on a tricycle in the 1/4 mile.

New(tires, battery, etc.) - were new when they were installed on the bike

Clean - hasn't been running since the last time I cleaned it

Classic - P.O. before him said the same thing, whatever that means

Just Needs... - Needs at least...

Wife is making me sell it - Even she knows it's not worth having

Grnrngr · « **Reply #52 on:** November 24, 2010, 08:39:00 PM »

Quote from: SOHC Digger on November 24, 2010, 08:19:50 PM

Wife is making me sell it - Even she knows it's not worth having

lmAo...

My wife used to say.."it's crap someone couldn't GIVE away, that's why they dumped it at the Goodwill.."

Kframe · « **Reply #53 on:** November 24, 2010, 09:00:10 PM »

It just needs a battery.

-K

Stev-o · « **Reply #54 on:** November 24, 2010, 09:07:40 PM »

I promise it's not seized!

[after noticing the motor would not kick over]

swellguy · « **Reply #55 on:** November 24, 2010, 09:50:31 PM »

"Cash only. I don't take certified checks, bank drafts or money orders."

Brandotheamazing · « **Reply #56 on:** November 24, 2010, 10:08:55 PM »

"if you don't buy it now, i'll do all the body work over a weekend and sell it for ten times" not from a bike, but a 68 Buick Skylark. It was HAMMERED, rusted out trunk trunk lid, hood, rad support, floors smashed in 1/4's no trans, rust in front and rear windshield jams. car wasn't worth it's weight to haul it off. the guy wanted my 83 regal (WITH THE FORD 9 INCH) and 400 bucks to take the car away, I laughed at him, and left. i wouldn't have taken the car for free to recycle. oh, and if he was that good of a body man, he wouldn't have been driving a 94 corolla with a drivers door that didn't open. BTW my regal, still mine, and with a 472 ci motor, it hauls, not the body i wanted, but it's got the boogie!

mrbreeze · « **Reply #57 on:** November 24, 2010, 10:30:35 PM »

Quote from: Hondawggie on November 24, 2010, 07:48:54 PM

"No I don't have the title, but it's not stolen. You won't have any trouble getting it registered."

'Just in case the DMV needs it, do you have a bill of sale from the person you bought it from?'

"No but the DMV never asks for that. You wont have any problem getting it registered."

"Did you register it?"

'No but its running and its a good deal.'

I bought it.

California DMV said 'the owner of record is not the person you bought it from, go back to that person and get the bill of sale they got from the registered owner.'

'Okay DMV, who's the registered owner?'
'Uh we can't disclose that, its a privacy issue.'

I called the guy I got it from. Disconnected phone.
DMV said 'Sorry we can't give you the title unless the owner, who is out of state by the way, releases his interest in writing.'

Never again.

Only way I got the title was on a technicality, the value of the bike was below some DMV threshold. Took me 2 weeks on the phone with the Sacramento DMV headquarters.

Never again.

That totally sux and I gotta say....the California Dmv can kiss my A$$$ over & over again cause I hate the California DMV & the can kiss my a$$ and..............

cameron · « **Reply #58 on:** November 24, 2010, 10:40:56 PM »

"My late husband used to just polish it all the time and go for a little ride on the weekends sometimes back when he was up and around.. God rest his soul. You are such a good boy for hauling this out of here.. he would have loved to see it go to use again."

mrbreeze · « **Reply #59 on:** November 24, 2010, 10:48:50 PM »

Quote from: cameron on November 24, 2010, 10:40:56 PM

"My late husband used to just polish it all the time and go for a little ride on the weekends sometimes back when he was up and around.. God rest his soul. You are such a good boy for hauling this out of here.. he would have loved to see it go to use again."

Lucky You Bro!!!!....rock that bike!!!

OldSchool_IsCool · « **Reply #60 on:** November 25, 2010, 06:06:35 AM »

Last thing I heard my PO say as I drove out of sight with signed title in my pocket...

"HEY! Shouldn't Ben Franklin's face be on these $100 bills??"

Muahahahahhhhhh!!!

blackhog02 · « **Reply #61 on:** November 25, 2010, 08:57:00 AM »

Went to look at a cb70 on craigslist two weeks ago. Looked great in the pic real clean and in good shape. Guy was asking $1,200 for it and judging from the pic it was a great deal. Finally got over there and it was totally rusted out with covers and parts missing. Asked the guy about the pic and he said it's the only pic of the bike he had, he took it when he purchased the bike. Me.. How long ago was that ... seller a few years ago. "I decided to tune it up and it has been sitting out back ever since". I told him it was worth maybe $200 to me and he said he was losing money on it and would not take less then the $1200 asking price. Needless to say I walked!!!

neilma · « **Reply #62 on:** November 25, 2010, 09:18:15 AM »

Admitedly this was for a car we were looking to buy (it was a Honda if that helps

Me: There isnt any service history - When was it last serviced? (Car had done 30K Miles at this point)

Seller: Service? No we never got it serviced, it didnt need it.

Me: Ok, thanks for you time, goodbye

Old Scrambler · « **Reply #63 on:** November 25, 2010, 09:31:53 AM »

Great Thread! A lady lost her FT500 to Katrina............she comes to the BARBER swap meet with her boyfriend and sees my FT500 with only 131 miles on it. Asking price was $3500. The title was in the former owner's name. She asked if I would take a check? I nodded and mailed her the title when the check cleared. No other words were expressed.

I have bought and sold over 30 bikes in the past few years and have heard almost all of these stories. The worst one to me was the guy that had two Triumph Mountain Cubs for sale and 30 Honda 305 Scarmblers. After a 4-hour drive with an empty van and trailer.....the Triumphs were T25Ws and the Scramblers were 13 parts bikes stored outdoors for several years. A came home empty.

Markcb750 · « **Reply #64 on:** November 25, 2010, 10:38:07 AM »

The pipes just have a little JB weld around the rear foot pegs...

(because he could not get it into the gaping holes between the two pipes.)

swellguy · « **Reply #65 on:** November 25, 2010, 11:05:38 AM »

"Oh . . . if she could only talk, the stories she would tell."

Ouch · « **Reply #66 on:** November 25, 2010, 11:58:55 AM »

"that stupid bike belonged to my loser EX-husband,,,,who is in jail now. Get it out of my yard please"

I sure did... right to my garage..

swellguy · « **Reply #67 on:** November 25, 2010, 03:13:47 PM »

"You can get all the fasteners you need for it at any Lowe's or Home Depot."

MoMo · « **Reply #68 on:** November 25, 2010, 03:39:22 PM »

Great idea for a thread, and funny responses. My favorite is ran when parked, like if you unpark it it'll start right up. Rare bike is another-I've seen that with Viragos, Cb750s, I guess if it is "rare" it must be really valuable. Just saw this classic on CL-"have bike need to off haven't started in a year
battery needs charge,front brakes need to be bleed,couldn't hurt to clean carbs or a good blast on highway ", seriously that was his grammar and punctuation, Larry

lwitchey · « **Reply #69 on:** December 04, 2010, 07:50:10 AM »

The best one that I got. "If I can't get that for it, I will bury it in the back yard."

MRieck · « **Reply #70 on:** December 04, 2010, 08:44:00 AM »

"I change the oil every 1000 miles" (the oil filter bolt is rounded off, there is rust all over it and it's 2 quarts low F'ing liar) "It handles funny" (because there is 10 lbs of air in the tires nutchucker) "I don't have a receipt but I know I bought this part here" (but I don't sell Harley parts dip$hit) "Can you just get it going for 500.00?" (bike has sat outside, uncovered in New England for 7 years...no...please leave) And my favorite "1000.00 ?? But I hardly use it" (yes but after 20 years of "hardly using it" and absolutely no maintenance there is a reason it is a POS).
Just a few lines I heard at my shop and my candid replies.

05c50 · « **Reply #71 on:** December 04, 2010, 12:02:28 PM »

I don't want to steal this thread, but Mike, since you're in the business I thought you and some other mechanic types might enjoy this............Caution, colorful lanquage ahead http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/7452561/

............Paul

CycleRanger · « **Reply #72 on:** December 04, 2010, 04:38:20 PM »

Quote from: 05c50 on December 04, 2010, 12:02:28 PM

I don't want to steal this thread, but Mike, since you're in the business I thought you and some other mechanic types might enjoy this............Caution, colorful lanquage ahead http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/7452561/

............Paul

Hysterical! ROFLMAO!

MRieck · « **Reply #73 on:** December 04, 2010, 05:29:56 PM »

Quote from: 05c50 on December 04, 2010, 12:02:28 PM

I don't want to steal this thread, but Mike, since you're in the business I thought you and some other mechanic types might enjoy this............Caution, colorful lanquage ahead http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/7452561/

............Paul

God....(my head in my hands)....I only wish I had said that stuff. Sounded like opera to me.

Thanks!

Loki047 · « **Reply #74 on:** December 04, 2010, 06:40:53 PM »

Seller: Oh it doesnt run, it just needs spark plugs

Me: So go get spark plugs

Seller: Just never got around to it.

Me: So go get spark plugs

Seller: You can do it and it will run great.

Me: Im leaving, go get spark plugs.

News:

Author Topic: Seller's famous last words! (Read 10851 times)

Markcb750