A rural farmer was walking along and notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand.
The farmer shouts, "Dunt be drinkin outta dat pond deer. Tis like da outhouse!"
(which means: "Don't drink the water. The cows, horses and pigs have pooped in it.")
The man shouts back, "I'm a tourist, I don't understand your stupid local rural accent. Can you speak English?"
The farmer shouts back, "Use two hands, you'll get more!"