Topic: Fishing

[Stixxy]

A man was stopped by a game warden out at Gull Lake recently with two ice chests full of live fish in water.
 
The game warden asked the man, "Do you have a license to catch those fish?"
 
"Naw, my friend, I ain't got no license.  These here are my pet fish."
 
"Pet fish?"
 
"Yep.  Every night I take these fish down to the lake and let 'em swim 'round for a while.   Then I whistle and they jump right back into this ice chest and I take 'em home."
 
"That's a bunch of BS!  Fish can't do that!"
 
The man looked at the game warden for a moment and then said, "It's the truth.  I'll show you.  It really works."
 
"Okay, I've GOT to see this!"
 
The man poured all the fish into the lake and stood and waited.
 
After several minutes, the game warden turned to him and said, "Well?"
 
"Well, what?" said the man.
 
"When are you going to call them back?"
 
"Call who back?"
 
"The FISH!"
 
"What fish?"
 

[weekend_junkie]

Nice!  I wish this worked for traffic stops.

"but officer, I'm not even MOVING, let alone speeding!"

[flopshot]

A police officer stops a man on the highway. The man says “Did you stop me for speeding?” The officer replies “Yes, I stopped you for speeding” The man replies “Well I have a gun in my glove compartment, and have a dead body in my trunk” The officer pulls back and calls for back up and waits. Minutes later back up arrives. The second officer says “My partner says you had a dead body in the trunk and a gun is the glove compartment." So the cop checks the glove compartment, no gun. He checks the trunk, no body. Officer 2 asks, "Do you have a gun?" The man says, "No, sir." "Did you steal this car?" "Nope." At last policeman 2 says, "My partner said you had a dead body and a gun." The guy replies, "I bet he said I was speeding too!!!"