Update:
Got the ears on the bike and both triple tree fit. The trick for anyone who stumbles upon this thread later on was to put the ears on the trees without the bushing. Then I pushed the bushing in (through the bottom circular hole for the fork tube, not the square hole for the tree) and forced one side onto the lip inside the ear. Then while holding one side of the bushing down, worked the rest of the bushing in. Actually popped into place. Worked a lot better than trying to work the ear on with the bushing already in place.
Of course none of that would have been possible without the lube advice I got in this thread. I did go with the Dow Corning hi-vac, I had to take out a second mortgage on the house to afford the lube, but I got a great interest rate. Not sure how another lube would compare, but the Dow Corning worked perfectly.