Topic: My Dad's Situation, "At Rehab" UPDATE!

[mattcb350f]

Very good Bill, when he said "You don't know how much I appreciate this.." I thought of my grandfather. He use to tell my dad the same thing when I did his yard work...wouldn't say it to me since I was a little young at the time. My dad use to tell him he's doing it for his grandpa not me! He use to love when I'd come up and fix his place up for him. It's a little work for sure but it means all the world to them! gives them a sense of pride and rejuvenation when there home is kept up.

 Glad to hear you both feel good about it 
  Matt.

[bill440cars]

            Thanks Sam and Matt,

                   It means a lot to ME that I was able to do it and I can hardly wait to go back and finish up. Well, finish up that stage of it anyway. There is a sort of fence built out of landscape timbers in the front yard, that is rotting and starting to fall apart and some other things in the front that were built about 30yrs  ago w/ some accent light and that is in poor shape too! I told him that that was next on the list, after I get the yard in good shape (front & back). Of course he's saying,"You don't have to do all that!" and I'm simply saying, "I know."

                    Right now, I'm feeling So Good, I'm on a high that is so natural!

                     BTW Matt, I know your feeling and I'm glad you have them too!
                     Take care guys!

                                   Later on, Bill

[Sam Green Racing]

Ya can come and do this old mans garden if you want Billy

Sam.

[DarkRider]

Glad to hear things are going great with your father Bill. Hopefully he gets a chance in enacting his plans when it comes to your ungreatful brother and his wife. Its sad that your brother thinks he should get it all when hes barely lifting a finger to help your dad out..if one of you are to be forced out of the will it should be him..Because hes not a son..hes just a vulture waiting to swoop in and take whats left...sorry for being blunt like that but thats how this situation is sounding like to me...

As before...you are in my prayers Bill

[jtb]

You're a good son, Billy.  Your dad appreciates you, and you'll remember these moments with him as long as you live.  I guarantee they'll bring a smile when ever they crop up.

John

[bill440cars]

       Hey Sam,

              Bud, between what I've got to take care of and trying to do what I can (when I can) for my Dad, I just don't see where I can fit YOUR old garden into the schedule!   You're gonna have to see if you can find someone over on YOUR side of the pond there Sam!

                 No offense Sam, Sometimes, I've got more than I can handle now! Take care Sam, I appreciate your efforts though.

                                   Later on, Bill  

[BobbyR]

Bill, your Dad has more days behind him than in front of him, a cruel fact we all face. How you help him live those days will bring you peace in your own mind. My own folks are in their late 80's and completely independent. My Brother is the VP of a Medical Center upstate which has a assisted living facility. He I plan to move them up there when they cannot take care of themselves. He can assure they will be well cared for. In this I am blessed by having a resource. My brother in law is still a POS and must be a genetic match for your Brother. I wish them both a very long yet miserable life. Just make peace in your own mind that you did what you could. 

PS. When you get him online give him a link to the Babe Thread. From the pics of him he looks like a real man and it should perk him right up!   

[bill440cars]

          Chris, You'll NEVER hear about me turning down any prayers. It just ain't gonna happen. My bother could stand tons of them. Sad to say, but I don't think he'd even acknowledge them.   He and his wife have finally been seen for what they are (far as I know) and Dad says that he's turning this thing around. I've asked him to let me know when he plans on making the changes, So that I can be there to help him in any way that he might need it. I'm concerned about what my brother and his wife might try to do. Plus, I've encouraged him to change all the locks on his house (or let me do it).

                                     Later on, Bill    

         

[bill440cars]

          John,  Thank you for your thoughts on this. My Mom and Dad tried to raise my brother and me, the best they knew how. They kept us in clothes and we always had food to eat. I really don't figure that my brother remembers the really tough times we had, those times were before he was born and up until he was in grade school. Our family started to prosper financially, along about the mid 60's and my parents managed to build a suitable retirement for themselves. Now, with my Mom gone, there's no telling how much my brother has cost the retirement that Dad should now be enjoying. I don't know how much that would be and, for the record, I don't want to know. If I found out, I'm liable to jump his butt like it's never been jumped before!! My Dad knows how my brother was and he seems to be getting worse. Dad is talking about having them evicted, if they don't back off! I don't want to see anyone get kicked out but, they are bringing it on themselves. We'll just have to see what happens.

                                      Later on, Bill    

[bill440cars]

         Bobby, that is great that your brother is in that position and that there are those resources to take care of your parents, when the time comes. My brother said that there was no way that Dad was going into a Nursing Home and then, when my Dad got feedup with them (my brother and his wife) he acted like he was going to take a swing at them both, at different times. If you knew my brother, you'd probably figure that my brother has experienced it before!

        My Dad IS his own man and gets his strength from God.

          I DO want to say thank you for each and every response from ALL those folks who made comments, offered suggestions in whatever way (here or by PM).

                                      Later on, Bill            

          BTW, I almost forgot, I made the offer to go down, get Dad and bring him to our house for Thanksgiving. And (he doesn't know that) when I take him home, I'm staying the night and finish the yard work the next day. That'll give more time to do the work and spend some decent time with him. We're working on Christmas also. Please remember us in your prayers.

   

[bill440cars]

         Called my Dad today to make sure he remembered that he was coming to our house for Thanksgiving this year. Everything's a go! Decided to ask him if he minded if, when I took him back home Thursday evening, I stayed over and finished up the yardwork on Friday and he said he sure didn't have a problem with that! I got to thinking that it would work out pretty good like that. I could get up and start early on the yard and have some more time to spend WITH him, before I'd have to return home again. He actually seems uplifted and seems to be more relaxed. I can't begin to explain how it feels to be able to give him something to look forward to.

                                   Later on, Bill

[bill440cars]

      Well, Our Thanks giving with my Dad went off without a hitch! Well, almost (nothing about my brother though)! We were going to rearrange the living room furniture to prepare for the Christmas tree   and because of one thing and then another, we didn't get that done until Wednesday (we had hoped to get the food prepared as much as possible, since I wouldn't be here to help Thursday morning), so we decided to get a "Dinner from a local Deli" and we did. Then, while I was on my way down to get my Dad Thursday morning, my wife called me to tell me that she woke up with a terrific headache (I left before she woke up) and didn't really feel like dealing with getting things ready for the meal. I suggested that we go to a local restaurant that would be serving a "Traditional Thanksgiving Dinner". Everything went great, I went on down, picked up my Dad, came back to my house, picked up everyone else, went out and had a great meal, had a great visit with my Dad, came back to the house for more visiting, had some pie for dessert, (after a bit) Dad & I headed back to his place (did some more visiting), I spent the night,  worked on the back yard this morning (very cold, lawn mower didn't want to start), took Dad to lunch (he wouldn't let me pay), went back and finished the back yard, talked with Dad off & on during the day, I finished up around 3pm, packed up my stuff (lawn mower, weed eater, gas & rake) and headed home. Several times, Dad said how much he appreciated what I was doing and that he really enjoyed the trip along with the meal too! During our talks, there was alot of good old memories bought back. He told me how and when he first saw and met my Mom and some of the things they did together. It is such a fantastic feeling, just knowing that he has had such a good time and felt so relaxed.

              BTW, I've already put in request for him to spend Christmas with us and actually have that home cooked meal this time. I'm sure hoping everyone had a Great Thanksgiving  (or something similar) Thursday (or when ever you celebrate it)

                             Later on, Bill              

[BobbyR]

Bill, you will carry that warm memory for the rest of your life. Glad you had the day with your Dad.

[bill440cars]

        Well, I talked with my Dad today (try to do that about every 2 or 3 days to see how he's doing and how THEY are treating him) and he says he's coming up here for Christmas Day, if nothing happens (I asked him what he meant and he was referring to, "If nothing happened to him"). Of course I don't even want to think about that! He says that They (my brother and his wife) are treating him better now. I'm sure they are, they're probably concerned about loosing what they think they're getting! I've got to get him to a lawyer that he feels comfortable with and get him to get his Will completely legalized and I hope he doesn't start going back and forth on what he wants to do. But, the fact is, I now feel completely satisfied that I've got him feeling better about things and even if he ends up giving my brother what should be rightfully mine, then I'll still feel good that I did what I should and my family will be minus my brother. But, I'll have no ill feelings about my Dad, he's a victum of circumstance (as I see it). BTW, Dad says he's feeling pretty good. Says he can't run a footrace and I told him, neither can I! He liked that.

                                     Later on, Bill

[Uncle Ernie]

Was just re-reading old posts here.  I'm reminded that my brother and I were different; we ate our clothes and wore our food. 

So, sounds like you're too busy to come here for a visit. 
If I got my garage out to YOU, could you paint it for me?  I'd feel a lot better, too.
















  alright.  a dark sense of humour.  we all deal with the crap differently. 

[bill440cars]

Was just re-reading old posts here.  I'm reminded that my brother and I were different; we ate our clothes and wore our food. 

So, sounds like you're too busy to come here for a visit. 
If I got my garage out to YOU, could you paint it for me?  I'd feel a lot better, too.


        Uncle, I sure hope you don't expect me to pay shipping on that garage!!!  

        I DO appreciate your humor!

                                 Later on, Bill















  alright.  a dark sense of humour.  we all deal with the crap differently. 

[DarkRider]

Some times a little humor is what we all need to get through some of the worst times in our lives...

[Uncle Ernie]

Got fired tonight. I worked at Target for about 3 weeks, but I'm too slow.
Should be a good addition to my resume. 
I've been told I'm too slow since grade school.  You'd think I'd be used to it by now.  I just figure everyone else moves too fast.  Everyone's in a rush.

This is getting Biblical.  If God asks me to kill anyone I know, I'm afraid I might fail that test, too.


Thought I'd slip that in, for some reason. 
Back to you, Bill.

[my78k]

Sorry to hear that Ernie! I know you have been struggling of late (from the Sicko thread) and am sure that this can't help...especially with the holidays etc.

Trick is to find something where speed is not the main priority. Seems to me like everyone wants stuff done double time but there is something to be said for a quality job too...

Hang in there...both of you!

Dennis

P.S. Hey Bill just a thought...have you considered inviting your brother up for the dinner too? I know it wouldn't be your first choice but in light of the holidays maybe you guys can put your differences aside for the day. It would ONLY be for your dad's sake. I am sure he loves you both and would cherish the chance to spend it with both of you...just a thought...

[Uncle Ernie]

That's a great idea, Bill !  With your brother there, you could whip out my garage in no time!

[bill440cars]

Got fired tonight. I worked at Target for about 3 weeks, but I'm too slow.
Should be a good addition to my resume. 
I've been told I'm too slow since grade school.  You'd think I'd be used to it by now.  I just figure everyone else moves too fast.  Everyone's in a rush.

This is getting Biblical.  If God asks me to kill anyone I know, I'm afraid I might fail that test, too.


Thought I'd slip that in, for some reason. 
Back to you, Bill.

          Uncle, I sure hate to hear about your job! I can appreciate your situation too! About 10 years ago, I was let go about this time of the year and I was at a loss about how I was going to get by. I DID have a retirement coming in (it was about half of what I made before retirement and didn't come near taking care of our needs. My wife was in depression from us having to deal with our daughter's seizure problems since the age of 11 months, her medical bills (which, even after insurance paid, were quite a lot) and trying to take care of their needs and mine and I was really stressed out myself. Back then, there were no motorcycles on my place at all, all I could do to take care of necessities! You hang in there Uncle, we're praying for you and the hope of your finding suitable employment too!
                             Later on, Bill  

[bill440cars]

Sorry to hear that Ernie! I know you have been struggling of late (from the Sicko thread) and am sure that this can't help...especially with the holidays etc.

Trick is to find something where speed is not the main priority. Seems to me like everyone wants stuff done double time but there is something to be said for a quality job too...

Hang in there...both of you!

Dennis

P.S. Hey Bill just a thought...have you considered inviting your brother up for the dinner too? I know it wouldn't be your first choice but in light of the holidays maybe you guys can put your differences aside for the day. It would ONLY be for your dad's sake. I am sure he loves you both and would cherish the chance to spend it with both of you...just a thought...

           Dennis, When I brought Dad up for Thanksgiving, I think he was truly giving Thanks for some time away from that. I do appreciate your thoughts and suggestions. My Dad has commented to me several times about having them evicted from the house they are living in, which actually belongs to my Dad. Dad's getting tired of them treating him like a child and has said so repeatedly when I'm there. Now, recently, he tells me that they (my brother and his wife) are treating him better, since I've been down there a few times (unannounced, I might add) visiting him and taking care of his yard for him. He continues to tell me that they are trying to show that he's not capable of taking care of himself so that they can put him in a "Nursing Home". Little does my brother know. If They did manage to get him in a Home, ALL of his assets would be under the control of the Nursing Home, to guarantee that they would be paid. This would include the house that my brother and his wife live in because it is in my Dad's name! I'll continue to do all I can for my Dad. I've tried for years to get my brother to "come around" to the way he should be and he keeps resisting. Now, After ALL this time, I figure it's HIS turn to try to make things right. If he'd make the effort, so would I. Thanks again Dennis!

                                   Later on, Bill    

[bill440cars]

That's a great idea, Bill !  With your brother there, you could whip out my garage in no time!

           Uncle, I'd much rather come to YOUR house and paint your garage than have a meal with my brother present. You DO have a point though. I could probably paint half the town of Greenwood, to keep from spending time with my brother!

           Uncle, you take care and hang in there buddy, it'll work out!

                                    Later on, Bill    

[malcolmgb]

Got fired tonight. I worked at Target for about 3 weeks, but I'm too slow.

Sorry to hear that Ernie but just remember 'Quality comes before Quantity'
I have visited a few Target stores on my visits over there and I don't remember seeing any staff rushing around. Good luck in your quest for a job, someone out there needs your talents you just need to find them

[GoatBaSS]

If target is anything like walmart, aside from the money I am glad you are out of there. It hurts to see what my sister has settled into having worked for the wals for so many years, the stories are epic and redundant, tiny people, fighting small battles, over a little amount of power, they can call theirs, for a short time. It is no different than the larger corps. Fear keeps them in line. And you sell that long enough and people believe it.
I am sorry for these uncertain times and I hope it gets better. Soon.