Author Topic: ...walks into a bar...  (Read 1785 times)

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Offline MJL

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...walks into a bar...
« on: September 19, 2008, 05:03:59 PM »
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey pal, why the long face?"

A rope walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve rope here." The rope walks out, ties himself in a half hitch, frays his ends and goes back in. "I told you, we don't serve rope here." "Nope, frayed knot."

A priest, a nun, and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "What is this, a joke?"

Two jews walk into a bar. They own it!

Two blondes walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

A carrot and a hamburger walk into a bar. The bartender tells them "We don't serve food here."

A man walks into a bar and says "Damn that hurt!"

A dog with a bandage on his foot walks into a bar and says "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."

A pirate with a steering wheel sticking out of his zipper walks into a bar. The bartender says "What's that steering wheel doing sticking out of your fly?" "Yar, it's drivin' me nuts."
No matter how fast or how far I rode, I couldn't leave her memory behind.

Markcb750

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #1 on: September 19, 2008, 06:29:49 PM »
Always loved that last one!

Offline Jonesy

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #2 on: September 20, 2008, 06:56:03 PM »
A ghost goes into a bar. The bartender told him, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve spirits here..."
"Every time I start thinking the world is all bad, then I start seeing people out there having a good time on motorcycles; it makes me take another look." -Steve McQueen

Offline MJL

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #3 on: September 21, 2008, 03:15:00 PM »
Some more good ones, thanks.
No matter how fast or how far I rode, I couldn't leave her memory behind.

Offline 333

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #4 on: September 21, 2008, 03:55:45 PM »
Quote
A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

I don't get this one.
Go metric, every inch of the way!

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Offline Jonesy

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #5 on: September 21, 2008, 06:09:09 PM »
Termites eat wood, most bars are made of wood. If the bar is tender it ought to be a fine meal for the Termite. (A play on words)
"Every time I start thinking the world is all bad, then I start seeing people out there having a good time on motorcycles; it makes me take another look." -Steve McQueen

Offline Kwality

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #6 on: September 21, 2008, 08:02:37 PM »
A woman walks into a bar and asked the bartender for a double entendre.  So he gave her one.

Offline 333

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #7 on: September 22, 2008, 06:51:31 PM »
Termites eat wood, most bars are made of wood. If the bar is tender it ought to be a fine meal for the Termite. (A play on words)

Doh!!!
Go metric, every inch of the way!

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Offline jbailey

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Re: ...walks into a bar...
« Reply #8 on: September 22, 2008, 08:11:44 PM »
A mushroom walks into a bar.  The Bartender says "we don't serve your kind here".  The Mushroom replies "Why not, I'm a fungi"?
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