Topic: Less than appropriate

[2001CVPI]

At Shady Rest Nursing Home, a Friday night movie was announced. Delores went right over to Hubert and said, "You're the best catch in the whole home. You have all your hair, most of your teeth, and don't even need a cane. If you go to the movie with me, I'll buy popcorn and lay my head on your lap during the movie." Hubert was ecstatic and accepted.

5 minutes later, Dottie went to Hubert and said, "You're the best catch in the whole home. You have all your hair, most of your teeth, and don't even need a cane. If you go to the movie with me, I'll buy popcorn and lay my head on your lap during the movie." Hubert accepted and went back to Delores. He explained, "I got a better offer," and repeated what Dottie had said.

Delores said, "That's exactly what I said! What does Dottie have that I don't?"

Hubert replied, "Parkinson's."

[1timduke]

HAHA, here's another...

Henry was getting up in years and his wife finally convinced him to go see a doctor about his many ailments.   After a few minutes the doctor arrived in the exam room.

Doctor: Well Henry, I've reviewed your chart and I need to run some tests to confirm some things.   I'm going to need a blood sample, a urine sample, and a stool sample.

Henry: (looks confused)

Wife: I'm sorry, you'll have to speak up, he's extremely hard of hearing.

Doctor: (louder) Henry, I'm going to need to run some tests, I need a blood sample, a urine sample and a stool sample.

Henry: Whah...huh??

Doctor: (much louder) A blood sample, a urine sample, and a stool sample!

Henry: (bewildered)

Wife: (screaming) DAMMIT HENRY, JUST GIVE HIM YOUR UNDERWEAR!!!

-Tim

[Head]

Thanks guys, It's always good to end the day with a good laugh. Head