Topic: New Baby Info Thread?

[zanorak]

It's struck me that a few guys have been posting about new babies in the last month or so. I thought it would be cool if all of us that have "been there wiped that" could drop a few tips about what we thought was a lifesaver.

I'll start:

In the first couple months YOU will be doing the nighttime stuff unless she has decided to do it. In my experience the transition from "I just gave birth and I'm going to sleep" to "I'm going to sleep" is undetectable! Get a comfy glider or rocker! You may be spending the next 6 months in it!

Get the pack and play with the vibrating tray AND REMOTE CONTROL. Make a pact with your woman that you will wait for 3 MINUTES for the baby to stop - try the button.  If the baby still cries then it's time to change or feed them. If you jump right up every time the baby cries they'll just CRY MORE! If they think they'll get better results by talking or astral projection or semaphore they'll do it!

Dr Brown's bottles - try them. They kept me spitup free for most of my daughter's first year.

Heartbeat bear - get this sucker right away! Record your girl's heartbeat and stick it in the crib. Way better than AC/DC.

[CBGhia]

If you have a boy...

Burp the diaper.  You have to let the cold air in, then close it for a few seconds cuz he is going to pee when the cold air hits his junk. This will keep you from getting the golden shower. 

[Gordon]

I have an 8 month old daughter and a 2 1/2 year old son, so babies have been my life for the last 2.5 years.  I'm far from an expert on the subject, but I'm currently immersed in the lifestyle.   

Forget about sleep.  It was a luxury you no longer have.  It will happen again, someday, but you don't have time to daydream about that right now.  It sounds like a bad joke, but it's true.  You'll be surprised at just how little you can function on.  Since our son was born, I've had on average 32 hours of sleep per week.  If you can afford (or want to pay for) daycare, then you may be able to get more.   

When the baby sleeps, you sleep.  Even if it's in the middle of the day and only for a few minutes, you need it, and you will function much better and be much happier if you do. 

A motorized baby swing and a baby Einstein (or other brand) jumper have been my saviors.  As babies, the swing calms them and lulls them to sleep when they're tired, and the jumper keeps them entertained and gives them an outlet for their energy when they're active, all while keeping them safe while you do housework, or whatever else you have to get done. 

Rechargeable batteries!!!  I can't say this enough.  We only have 6 D's, 6 C's, and 10 AA's, and they have saved us who knows how much money over buying regular batteries, plus you don't have to make an extra trip to the store just to get new batteries.  Put them on your baby shower registry if it hasn't already happened. 

Avoid toys that require batteries as much as possible.  Not just because they need batteries to run, but because they make a lot of noise.  Let all of your relatives know that you would prefer old-fashioned toys that require imagination rather than batteries.  When you do receive gifts of toys that need batteries, remember that your child doesn't know this.  If you never put batteries in the toy and turn it on, they don't know it has that capability, and they'll still enjoy it just as much. 

Pacifiers... (soothers, binkies, whatever you want to call them):   This is a touchy subject for some.  Neither of my children has ever touched a pacifier, but I have nothing against parents who do use them.  It's a personal choice.  My wife and I decided before our son was born that we would not use them.  We have both seen, on multiple occasions, the battle that ensues when weaning a child off of his/her pacifier.  The will of a 2 year old is amazingly strong, and when you're that tired it's hard to put up much of a fight.  It's my opinion that you're trading a certain measure of peace at the onset for a huge battle down the road.  It may or may not be that bad for you, but that wasn't a chance my wife and I wanted to take. 

When friends or relatives tell you to let them know if they can help, take them up on it.  Keep a list in your wallet of people who have offered to help, and hold them to it!  It's not a punishment for them.  It's been my experience that the people who offer to help actually want to, and it makes them happy to be able to help, but once the offer is made they need you to let them know when you need them.  You and your spouse need time away from the house, alone, with each other.  Don't forget why it was you got together and started having babies in the first place.  Your children will be much better off if you are happy, even if it mean a little bit of time away from them.  This isn't just for children with married parents.  If you're separated or divorced, or widowed or a widower, your children want to see you happy. 

Cherish each minute you have with your children.  You will never get this time back.  When it's 3am, and your baby is screaming, and you have to be at work in three hours and all you want to do is sleep, remember that there is only a very short time in your lives together that you'll have the power to hold your baby in your arms, tell her that everything is okay, and rock her back to sleep.

 

[flybox1]

great thread..
dad of 4: boys 7 & 4, twin girls 4 mos.

I got lucky.  i work 60hrs a week.  
wifey does most of the night time stuff, but wakes me when she needs a 2nd hand.

+1 on the binkies.  just for sleep time.  hook 'em up before they go down, and take them away once asleep.
get a swing.  something they can sit, recline, lay down, sleep in.
if its got a tray, or something you can put dry foods, toys, etc. in for them as they get older and more active/involved.

Babies have touchy stomachs - acid reflux/gas.
simethicone, mylicon, etc.  for gas.  love this stuff.
for acid reflux, or, if you have fussy kids after they eat, try keeping them upright, or at lease reclining for a bit after they eat.  this helps promote digestion and prevent fussiness due to reflux.
one of my girls had it so bad we had to resort to prescription meds to keep her from vomiting after each feeding.

- if someone offers their help.  TAKE IT!
- when baby is sleeping, you are sleeping.
- get your kids on a schedule. FAST! eat, play, sleep.  same times each day (as best you can) make it fit your schedule, but make it a routine. you'll appreciate knowing when nap time is coming.    we've now got twin 4month olds sleeping TWO 6 hr stretches at night.  Love it!
- put them on the floor with toys, on both stomach and back. its good exercise.  get down there with them.
- give momma a rest.  take Jr. outside.  go for a walk, a drive, etc.

- get a BABY BJORN!  these are SWEET.  straps your kid to your back or chest, allows you to be hands free to do stuff, like mow, do housework, wash your car, clean your workshop, and even WORK ON YOUR BIKE!!!!!!
Get one in black, and put a SOHC4 patch on the front of it.  STYLIN'!!!

...and make your kid smile every day!

[zanorak]

TOTALLY agree about the pacifier! We only used it at night (right at bedtime or during the night to quiet her) and when necessary at restaurants and the like. I think that's contributed to her teeth coming in straight!

[ieism]

I have five months left to learn all this baby stuff

Figured that if I would everything the exact oposite of what my parents did, it would be fine.

Right now i'm more worried about the giving birth part than anything else. I hate hospitals, pain, blood and mucus, and i'm not sure I can be suportive for my wife in that situation. I can't even watch a birth on tv without feeling sick, how do I get over that?

[CaféElite]

Cherish each minute you have with your children.  You will never get this time back.  When it's 3am, and your baby is screaming, and you have to be at work in three hours and all you want to do is sleep, remember that there is only a very short time in your lives together that you'll have the power to hold your baby in your arms, tell her that everything is okay, and rock her back to sleep. 

+1

Also if your child vomits in the middle of the night, after you get them and the bed cleaned up put down a nice thick towel just incase they decide to do it again. I also put three pillow covers on her pillow to avoid having to try and clean it.

Bunnies are better house pets then guinea pigs... Just saying.

[flybox1]

I have five months left to learn all this baby stuff

Figured that if I would everything the exact oposite of what my parents did, it would be fine.

Right now i'm more worried about the giving birth part than anything else. I hate hospitals, pain, blood and mucus, and i'm not sure I can be suportive for my wife in that situation. I can't even watch a birth on tv without feeling sick, how do I get over that?

  i dont know brother, but you better find a way.  you gotta be there for your wife!  besides, you'll get puked on, pee'd on, shat on.  anything that can come out of a baby, it WILL get on you! 

[Alan F.]

I can't even watch a birth on tv without feeling sick, how do I get over that?

You don't, those videos won't prepare you for the sounds she'll make, or how tight she'll squeeze your hand.
And then there's that smell.......

[flybox1]

And then there's that smell.......

....dont forget the afterbirth

[mattcb350f]

Cool thread idea 

...have a two month old daughter and yes, sleep when the baby sleeps is good advice but hard to do. Fortunately with much persistance, we got her to sleep at night....but I've heard this is very rare for a newborn 

Dr Brown's bottles - try them. They kept me spitup free for most of my daughter's first year.

I agree, the design is great and keeps air swallowing to a minimum.

 Matt.

[zanorak]

The smell! I almost forgot about that.

Ok - the actual birthing is the flat out scariest thing you'll ever be party to. It's not like when you're gutting a deer or cleaning a dirty cooler or anything like that. It's so.... organic and human. This is all compounded by the fact that this is all happening to someone you love. You HAVE to be there for her. All of the nurses and midwives I talk to tell me they're ready for dad to pass out first. That's how common this is - we just can't take seeing our loved ones in pain. Just be cool and remember that you are necessary no matter what it feels like. (in the room you're like tits on a boar - they could care less about you - but to her you're absolutely necessary) You need to be there and support her OR YOU WILL NEVER LIVE IT DOWN.

Don't look in the mirror if you can't stand blood. DON'T look at the real thing if you can't look at the mirror!
Don't forget to pack that bag before you go to the hospital. They will NOT feed you no matter how far into labor she is. (take candy bars) Hospital food almost always sucks.
Don't leave your social security card and drivers license at home. They'll make you fill out a bunch of paperwork after the birth. Have somebody you trust help you. Trust me....
Read your patients bill of rights too - just in case.
SHop for a car seat. You can't leave without one.
If you're not married, be prepared to be named as the defendant in a child support case by the state. It's no sweat, just go in to the meeting and be nice. You'll be the only couple in there not hating each other.

Man, lots of stuff I didn't know I knew. Thanks everybody for contributing to the thread!

[demon78]

Ahh sleep glorious sleep.
Bill the demon.

[lordmoonpie]

Buy the Haynes Manual for "Baby" - it's really really good, even has pictures of the different types of poo you can expect!

[Alan F.]

If she's scheduled for induced labor, leave a little early and have a nice modest meal at a restaurant she likes. Hospital food sucks everywhere and you'll starve before it arrives anyway.

[ieism]

So you're saying it's worse than gutting a deer? I have a little experience gutting a sardine, about half a sardine actually.
Sounds like more fun than I anticipated

Thanks for the input, I'll leave my contact lenses at home then...and will bring food that will be easy to vomit out again. Why are we doing this again? 

p.s. you're scaring me.

[Rushoid]

Man, I'm just like you! I have a hard time stomaching sights like that. When my first was born I kept telling myself to just focus on my wife's needs and don't look. But, when I overheard the doctor say something about seeing the head, I looked! I saw her come out and forgot about everything else in the world! I wouldn't have traded that for anything. In short, your instincts will take over, good or bad. Just go with it!

By the way, my 3rd (first boy) was being stubborn and didn't want to come out. After a long labor he did, with the umbilical wrapped  around his neck, tied in a knot, and him clenching it in his tiny little fist. Scary as it was, he was/is fine, and I wouldn't have missed that for the world either. The nurses were all amazed and called him a "miracle baby." At 3 1/2 he's now a "holy terror." 

Oh, when you find a blankie - BUY TWO! That way you can wash one while the other is being used.

[Don R]

One don't- don't wake up in the morning and say- Gee the baby slept all night huh?  I'm still paying for that one and she is 23 now.

[zanorak]

LOL! It's not THAT scary. Just freaks you out, very primal. But it's true, don't miss seeing that head crown. You'll never forgive yourself.

I second buying two blankies. Also two of every sheet and blanket.
Don't forget the rubber sheet either!

[Alan F.]

Yup, two of everything is right. My girl was 6 or so when her favorite giggling stuffed toy stopped giggling, she was heartbroken and so was I.
5 minutes later and I had another on the way from an ebay seller, she's 8 now and it's still giggling....life is good.

I even picked up a spare of my son's favorite little bear while I was at it.

[zanorak]

Two is one and one is none as the marines like to say!

Here's a thought for new babies: Hair ligatures. My brother had this happen.. a piece of hair can come through the laundry or whatever and get wrapped around a baby's finger, ear, toe, or penis. It cuts off the circulation. Check for them whenever you can... they had a close call.

[ieism]

OK, so i've been doing a little research since my last post and i'm now pretty confident that you guys are way ahead of me. I've asked my friends about some of the stuff you recommended, but it doesn't seem to be the norm here.
Looks like when it comes to babies, we're kinda stuck in the middle ages here.

I think I need one of those motorized babyseats, can you recommend one? I will have to order it from the US, so I want to make sure I get the best one.
And it seems there is only one brand of carseat/babybed thing here, and I hate the way it looks. They're called Maxicosy  , and there's just no way that something called Maxicosy is going to be installed in my car. I need something better than that, something cool looking and hightech.

Also, what's a "pack and play with the vibrating tray AND REMOTE CONTROL" and an "Einstein Jumper". It sound like something I need, but I'm pretty sure my friends don't have those either.

[moham]

OK, so i've been doing a little research since my last post and i'm now pretty confident that you guys are way ahead of me. I've asked my friends about some of the stuff you recommended, but it doesn't seem to be the norm here.
Looks like when it comes to babies, we're kinda stuck in the middle ages here.

I think I need one of those motorized babyseats, can you recommend one? I will have to order it from the US, so I want to make sure I get the best one.
And it seems there is only one brand of carseat/babybed thing here, and I hate the way it looks. They're called Maxicosy  , and there's just no way that something called Maxicosy is going to be installed in my car. I need something better than that, something cool looking and hightech.

Also, what's a "pack and play with the vibrating tray AND REMOTE CONTROL" and an "Einstein Jumper". It sound like something I need, but I'm pretty sure my friends don't have those either.

britax is the name you want in carseats. they are spendy but worth every penny.

[Gordon]

OK, so i've been doing a little research since my last post and i'm now pretty confident that you guys are way ahead of me. I've asked my friends about some of the stuff you recommended, but it doesn't seem to be the norm here.
Looks like when it comes to babies, we're kinda stuck in the middle ages here.

I think I need one of those motorized babyseats, can you recommend one? I will have to order it from the US, so I want to make sure I get the best one.
And it seems there is only one brand of carseat/babybed thing here, and I hate the way it looks. They're called Maxicosy  , and there's just no way that something called Maxicosy is going to be installed in my car. I need something better than that, something cool looking and hightech.

Also, what's a "pack and play with the vibrating tray AND REMOTE CONTROL" and an "Einstein Jumper". It sound like something I need, but I'm pretty sure my friends don't have those either.

I think somewhere between the middle ages and what a lot of parents over here get for their babies now is probably a good place to be.  Some new parents just go way overboard with all the high-tech, super fancy, super expensive stuff they get "for the baby", when in reality the baby doesn't care, and as long as he or she is safe and comfortable they'll be just as happy no matter what things they have.  

Both of my children have had lots of toys from day one, due mostly to the grandparents and aunts, but both of them at around 9 months old decided that an empty cardboard box and an empty plastic soda bottle were their favorite toys.

As far as a brand name for the motorized swing, ours was a Graco, but I'm not sure if you're going to have the same brands available where you are.  Just get something that has a good reputation and isn't too expensive and is just a basic swing.  And get some rechargeable batteries to power it or you'll be throwing away your money on regular batteries.  

[Gordon]

Also, what's a "pack and play with the vibrating tray AND REMOTE CONTROL" and an "Einstein Jumper". It sound like something I need, but I'm pretty sure my friends don't have those either.

A "pack and play" is just a collapsible play-pen/crib.  It folds and unfolds relatively easily and can be brought along in the car when you're going to be gone from home for extended periods.  I'm not sure about the vibrating tray and remote control, but it sounds like overkill to me. 

A Baby Einstein jumper is a stand-alone piece that your baby sits in with its feet on the ground so it can stand and jump without getting hurt.  It has a large ring that surrounds the baby with toys attached, and the seat swivels to turn around and play with all of them.