1. For no reason whatsoever your bike would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they put new trail markings up, you would have to buy a new bike.
3. Occasionally your bike would die on an uphill for no reason, and you would accept this, restart and ride on.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn, would cause your bike to shut down and refuse to start, in which case you have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a bike that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to ride, but it would only run on five percent of the trails/roads.
6. On street bikes, only one person at a time could use the bike, unless you bought "Bike95" or "BikeNT". But then you would have to buy more seats.
7. The bike would say "Are you sure?" before applying the brakes.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your bike would refuse to run until you simultaneously grabbed the plug wire, held the rear valve stem, and used the kickstarter.
9. Yamaha would require all buyers to purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally Topographical maps (now a Yamaha subsidiary), even though they neither needed nor wanted them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the bike's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, Yamaha would become the target of investigation by the Justice Dept.
10. Every time Yamaha would introduce a new model, buyers would have to learn to ride all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old bike.
11. You'd press the "Start" button to shut off the engine.
12. On street bikes, the speedometer and tachometer would be replaced by an icon that comes on when the bike is running.
