I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the
Biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said "You're pulling
My leg."
I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice!! At least I presume
She was poor - she only had $1.20 in her purse.
My girlfriend thinks that I'm a stalker. Well, she's not exactly my
Girlfriend yet.
Went for my routine checkup today and everything seemed to be going
Fine until he stuck his index finger up my butt! Do you think I
Should change dentists?
A wife says to her husband you're always pushing me around and talking
Behind my back. He says what do you expect? You're in a wheel chair.
I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get
Reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she
Would like to come back as a cow. I said, "You're obviously not
Listening".
A buddy of mine has just told me he's getting it on with his
Girlfriend and her twin. I said "How can you tell them apart?" He
Said "Her brother's got a mustache."
