Topic: what would you do if you came outside and someone had moved your bike?

[Gordon]

1. Go trough your garage and find some important-looking screws, springs and washers. Crome ones will work best.
2. Tape them to his handlebar with a note saying: "guess where these came from?............."
3. Watch from a distance and see if he dares to drive his bike home.

I like that one!  Reminds me of an idea someone else had (may have been on this forum) about leaving a note on someone's car/bike that just says "I don't have insurance, but sorry about that scratch".  Only works in the case of an expensive new car or bike, but I can just see the owner pacing back and forth around their vehicle inspecting every last inch looking for that blemish.

[nickjtc]

Reminds me of an idea someone else had (may have been on this forum) about leaving a note on someone's car/bike that just says "I don't have insurance, but sorry about that scratch".  Only works in the case of an expensive new car or bike, but I can just see the owner pacing back and forth around their vehicle inspecting every last inch looking for that blemish.

That is a really good one; no damage done, nothing to stop the person riding the bike away, but you're really messing with their mind about what has been damaged.

[BobbyR]

If you can use a straight pin to short through one of the plug wires, thing won't run. If it is really a HD not running will not appear out of the ordinary. Like all these little paybacks, just don't get caught or you could catch an ass whuppin.

[jasonbox]

casually hit the emergency shutoff switch on the handlebars. Sit inside and laugh your @ss off

Haaa Haaa Haaa Haaa Haaa Haaa LoL

That's great!

[Roach Carver]

stab them in the neck with a screw driver. The look on their faces will be priceless. ( did someone have  that idea already? I sure hope not.)

[92t0rider]

"throw a lubed condom, used if you like,  into their helmet"

"sardine in the tailpipe"

"piss on the engine"

"stab them in the neck with a screwdriver" WTF?? Hahahahahaha!

Geeze Ill make a note never to get on the bad side of anyone here!!!

F vcking riot.

[Gordon]

stab them in the neck with a screw driver. The look on their faces will be priceless.

Why the hell didn't I think of that!?  I'm keeping a screwdriver handy from now on!

And a camera...

[angeldeville]

stab them in the neck with a screw driver. The look on their faces will be priceless. ( did someone have  that idea already? I sure hope not.)

I have an old rusty flathead that would be perfect!

I even have a small ball-peen hammer that would work as well.

[JSGAuto]

I guess I am one of the only one on the opposite side here.  Sometimes a bike has to be moved.  

About 4 months ago I had to pull an enclosed trailer to Wisconson (from NJ).  The trailer is located on the ground level floor of a parking deck in the first spot (reserved for the trailer).  When pulling the trailer out of the spot you have to immeditly cut left in order to avoid one of the pillers.  On the left side of the trailer is a Bike.  It was illegaly parked in one of those small yellow No Parking spaces, in front of an electrical box, or whatever.  Anyway, it was impossible to get the trailer out with the bike there (it was very close to the trailer.  So I walked up to the nearest police officer, and asked for help.  We lifted the bike over several feet (had a fork lock) so that I could get out.  Waiting around for the owner was not an option.  The bike was of course handled carefully.

So I guess there are cases where bikes can be moved, it was his fault for parking in an illegal spot.  (not that I haven't parked illegaly, the lot gets full) but it would have been nice if he wasn't right on top of the trailer as well.  

FYI, not that it matters, but it was a Harley, and he got a ticket for illegal parking.  

Jim

[Gordon]

I think that's a completely different situation that what's being talked about here. 

[JSGAuto]

Well of course.  But just think if that owner came out and saw me moving the bike?  I am sure he would think the same things as others are here.  Might just be a good idea to figure out why someone is touching your bike before going crazy.  (although I know I would lose it too)  Sometimes a screw driver is necessary.

[putnaja1]

Or squirtgun/piss all over engine...

BWAHAHAHAHA!  That's pretty good- I'm trying to think of the biking equivalent of the flaming bag of dog#$%* approach..

Perhaps smash some dog#$%* into the cooling fins!  This would be tricky to pull of "cleanly" however!  :-)  I'm thinking you'd have to have some #$%* on a spatula, wait until no one is looking, then run up and do it up! 

Or, how about superglue a big, realistic and fleshy looking dildo to the gas tanK!   That, and take some glittery stick-on letters from the art store, and spell out "c*ck lover" on the dude's gas tank!  That will teach him!   

[ElCheapo]

I think you guys are all giving this fool too much energy. Just squirt on some skunk spray ot Doe in Heat on his bike and be done with it.