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Offline jamesb

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On a personal note
« on: December 07, 2012, 09:46:04 PM »
Tonight I am happy. My son finally got his own place and so I chased his mom around the house (thank goodness it's a small house) I now feel like a young man again "kinda" but unfortunately I tired and it's time for bed. If there are any of you young ones out there and your living at home get out and let mom and dad have fun.
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Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #1 on: December 07, 2012, 10:56:16 PM »
You obviously haven't seen my wife. Uuuugggghhhh.............  :o
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I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline Jerry Rxman Griffin aka MuthaF'er

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #2 on: December 07, 2012, 11:16:13 PM »
Quote from: Terry in Australia on December 07, 2012, 10:56:16 PM
You obviously haven't seen my wife. Uuuugggghhhh.............  :o

Terry ain't #$%*tin you either  :o He's been trying to adopt  ;D I tried sending my ex over but she moved down the street. At least she moved out
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As of today 3/13/2012 my original owner 75 CB750F has made it through 3 wives, er EX-wives. Free at last.  ;-)

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #3 on: December 07, 2012, 11:19:20 PM »
I took my wife for a drive to the dump last weekend Jerry, and the workers there kept putting her back into the car! ;D
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I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline Jerry Rxman Griffin aka MuthaF'er

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2012, 11:24:42 PM »
Is there a Humane Society equivalent downunder? They take in stray dogs. Perhaps if you give them a sizeable donation they will sympathize with you?
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As of today 3/13/2012 my original owner 75 CB750F has made it through 3 wives, er EX-wives. Free at last.  ;-)

Offline dave500

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #5 on: December 08, 2012, 12:36:56 AM »
someone asked my wife why her wedding ring is on the wrong finger,,she told them its because she married the wrong man.
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Offline ekpent

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #6 on: December 08, 2012, 06:29:57 AM »
"My wife and I were happy for twenty years,  then we met"

    Rodney Dangerfield 











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Offline Trevor from Warragul

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #7 on: December 08, 2012, 02:27:16 PM »
Life's a #$%*, then you marry one...
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Offline Stev-o

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #8 on: December 08, 2012, 04:18:59 PM »
Can't live with em, can't live without em. Sure ya can!
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Offline Retro Rocket

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #9 on: December 08, 2012, 04:26:34 PM »
And like my mate says, "if they didn't have lady bits they would be stacked 10 high at the dump"       ;D 8)
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Offline Damfino

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #10 on: December 08, 2012, 07:33:48 PM »



Who you callin' ugly sucka?!

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You know, a long time ago being crazy meant something. Nowadays everybody's crazy.
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Quote from: Frankenstuff on December 29, 2010, 08:11:48 PM
You've got to watch your back in the SSDB, this is where the clever guys get bored with bike talk and make poo jokes.
I like my women a little big. Natural. Now, they shave this and wax that. It's not right. I love natural women. Big women. This trend in women has to go. Bulomia, anorexia. That's just wrong. You know what will cure that? My special sticky buns. One lick of my sticky buns and your appetite will come right back. ~ RIP Mr. Borgnine  01/24/1917 - 07/08/2012  :'(

Offline dave500

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #11 on: December 08, 2012, 09:27:29 PM »
i went to a wife swapping party and came home with a perfectly working weed wacker.
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Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #12 on: December 08, 2012, 10:56:39 PM »
Hey let me know when another one of them wife swapping parties is on Dave, I need a new lawn edger! ;D
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I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline Retro Rocket

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #13 on: December 08, 2012, 11:02:35 PM »
Quote from: Terry in Australia on December 08, 2012, 10:56:39 PM
Hey let me know when another one of them wife swapping parties is on Dave, I need a new lawn edger! ;D

Geeze, you guys must have great wifes, i'd be happy swapping with a new coffee cup and i'd probably still have to pay half..... :o
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750 K2 1000cc
750 F1 970cc
750 Bitsa 900cc
If You can't fix it with a hammer, You've got an electrical problem.

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #14 on: December 08, 2012, 11:16:01 PM »
Yeah, I was probably being a bit greedy Mick, to get a good used edger I'd probably have to throw in her sister too, if I could lift her! ;D
« Last Edit: December 09, 2012, 12:20:03 AM by Terry in Australia »
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I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline dave500

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #15 on: December 09, 2012, 12:02:13 AM »
i married my wife for her looks,,but not the one shes giving me right now!
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Offline dave500

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #16 on: December 09, 2012, 01:38:44 AM »
when we first met she said she would only sleep with me if we had a kid,so i said ok(just to get my way with her),so when she wasnt looking i slipped a condom on,,then after as we lay there all nice and loving she asked me what we should call our kid,as i tied a knot in the condom and flipped it out the window i said "if he can get out of that we should call the little #$%*er houdini" !!
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Offline Bailgang

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #17 on: December 09, 2012, 05:57:10 AM »
Quote from: jamesb on December 07, 2012, 09:46:04 PM
Tonight I am happy. My son finally got his own place and so I chased his mom around the house (thank goodness it's a small house) I now feel like a young man again "kinda" but unfortunately I tired and it's time for bed. If there are any of you young ones out there and your living at home get out and let mom and dad have fun.

Here's a tip you may want to seriously consider. Make sure you make it VERY clear to your son that if he ever stops by your place unexpectedly or unannounced that the moment he steps through the front door he very clearly shouts "HI MOM AND DAD I'M HOME" before he takes another step thus giving you and your wife enough time to close your bedroom door. My youngest got home from college a day earlier than planned, it was in the late evening, the lights were out while my wife and I were "busy", not knowing what was going on my kid decided to enter the house quietly so he wouldn't disturb anyone. Lets just say he got a glimpse of something that's going to stay in his long term memory for life. :)
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Offline Xnavylfr

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #18 on: December 09, 2012, 06:35:05 AM »
I thought thats why they have sheep in Australia!!
You put their back legs in your boots and point their head down hill and they try their best to back up!!!



Xnavylfr(CHUCK)
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Offline Damfino

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #19 on: December 09, 2012, 06:49:39 AM »



Damn Chuck, you seem to know that procedure all too well... ;D ;D
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Your Message Here!
You can still call me 'Schmitty'

1976 CB 750
2014 CB 1100DLX
2015 Harley Davidson Freewheeler



You know, a long time ago being crazy meant something. Nowadays everybody's crazy.
Charles Manson

Quote from: Frankenstuff on December 29, 2010, 08:11:48 PM
You've got to watch your back in the SSDB, this is where the clever guys get bored with bike talk and make poo jokes.
I like my women a little big. Natural. Now, they shave this and wax that. It's not right. I love natural women. Big women. This trend in women has to go. Bulomia, anorexia. That's just wrong. You know what will cure that? My special sticky buns. One lick of my sticky buns and your appetite will come right back. ~ RIP Mr. Borgnine  01/24/1917 - 07/08/2012  :'(

Offline dave500

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #20 on: December 09, 2012, 11:39:47 AM »
Quote from: Xnavylfr on December 09, 2012, 06:35:05 AM
I thought thats why they have sheep in Australia!!
You put their back legs in your boots and point their head down hill and they try their best to back up!!!



Xnavylfr(CHUCK)

thats new zealanders chucklehead.
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Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #21 on: December 10, 2012, 02:50:54 AM »
Yeah, Chucklehead, when we were kids we were so poor we couldn't afford sheep, so we had to do it with American women instead! ;D
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I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline Raul CB750K1

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #22 on: December 10, 2012, 03:18:43 AM »
Quote from: dave500 on December 09, 2012, 01:38:44 AM
when we first met she said she would only sleep with me if we had a kid,so i said ok(just to get my way with her),so when she wasnt looking i slipped a condom on,,then after as we lay there all nice and loving she asked me what we should call our kid,as i tied a knot in the condom and flipped it out the window i said "if he can get out of that we should call the little #$%*er houdini" !!


The spanish version of the joke is with "McGyver" instead of "Houdini"... :-)
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Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #23 on: December 10, 2012, 03:25:24 AM »
Quote from: Raul CB750K1 on December 10, 2012, 03:18:43 AM
Quote from: dave500 on December 09, 2012, 01:38:44 AM
when we first met she said she would only sleep with me if we had a kid,so i said ok(just to get my way with her),so when she wasnt looking i slipped a condom on,,then after as we lay there all nice and loving she asked me what we should call our kid,as i tied a knot in the condom and flipped it out the window i said "if he can get out of that we should call the little #$%*er houdini" !!


The spanish version of the joke is with "McGyver" instead of "Houdini"... :-)

McGyver was Spanish Raul? I didn't know that? ;D
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I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline dave500

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Re: On a personal note
« Reply #24 on: December 11, 2012, 12:14:17 AM »
youd never find a piece of tin foil ,some used matches and a lump of chewing gum in a condom!
« Last Edit: December 11, 2012, 01:36:40 AM by dave500 »
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