Author Topic: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.  (Read 90035 times)

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Offline jgger

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #25 on: January 09, 2024, 12:45:33 AM »
Ride # 2 is done! But I want to add a disclaimer,  there is no format to follow to post your rides, so if you are riding post it! Tell a story if you like and post some pictures, we all like pics. 50 miles is easy, so let's hear about it.

Some stats:
   Starting temp. 61°f/16°c
   Mid trip 43° f/6°c
   Back home 58°f/14°c
Distance 115 mi/185 km

It started out as a trip to Bass Pro to buy a Yeti coffee cup to keep in my side case. The store is just off of Foothill Blve in Rancho Cucamonga AND Foothill Blvd just happens to be part of Route 66, so it NEEDED to be explored. Rt 66 has been bypassed over the years so it only really exists in pieces, some are interesting and some are pretty boring.. I saw a little of both, riding through Fontana and San Bernardino surface streets kinda sucks. However I did see a bit of original rt 66 stuff like the Wig Wam Motel. The rooms are individual plaster buildings that look like Tee Pees and is still in operation today. Most of what I saw was just signs here and there and Rt 66 painted in the street. A lot of the sections of road are falling apart from neglect and you really need a map to show how to follow the original road. I wanted to see some of the original parts in Cajon Pass, there is alot of Old West history going backto the Spaniards and local Indian tribes. I will have to go back when the weather is warmer,  that part of the ride was in the low 40's.

My next trip up to the High Desert I will probably do some exploring around Victorville and on into Barstow, just to see how much of Rt 66 I can find. A note to Terry, you should start checking on places you want to see for your "dream trip" and be ready to do quite a bit of back tracking and detours from the main interstates to hit some actual Rt 66 stuff.

Anyhoo, it was a great 115 miles and Eeyore the Magnificent behaved himself very well. Now on to the pics!

« Last Edit: January 09, 2024, 09:24:14 AM by jgger »
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Offline budman

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #26 on: January 11, 2024, 03:05:03 PM »
Ride #1, 93 miles.

The year started out a little damp and cold.  The weather was decent this past weekend, but my son was here for a visit, and I couldn't get out.  I've also been working a lot.  It's been windy all week, but the temps were up with a high of 71F today.  It was a little windy this morning, but not that bad.  It did start getting more severe around 11:00 am and I thought I might have to ditch my ride plans.  It slowed down some about 1:00 pm, so I went for it.  About five miles out the wind wasn't bad at all.  The skies were clear and it was an all-out beautiful day.
 
I had enough gas in the Scout to make it down to Comfort.  I made a brief pit stop on the way at one of the city parks I usually stop at when I'm in that area.  Got my fuel and started heading back north, with a short photo stop as I was riding up and out of a valley.

It felt like I hadn't ridden in weeks, but my last ride was only on 12/30.  I'm glad to get the first one done for the year.  Unfortunately, it's going to start getting cold again...really cold!  Depending on which weather site I look at we're probably looking at a low of 8-12F next Tuesday morning.  If their forecasts are accurate, then next Thursday looks like it might be a good day to ride.

Jim, your photos are awesome and inspiring.  Keep them comin'.
Bud

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Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #27 on: January 11, 2024, 03:09:30 PM »
Well done Jim and Bud, and great pics! Well yesterday was nice, so I decided that ride #3 was in order. I've been enjoying the black Rocket, but at the same time ignoring the rest, so my original intent was to sort the ignition on the K0 (but I can't ride it yet as my permit expired last month and I forgot to send it to the Club permit guy for approval, I better do that today) but got hosed over by my local chemist, who made me wait over an hour to collect some prescriptions, so by the time I took my drugs home, got changed and headed to the storage place, it was too late to work on the Honda.

My "owned from new" Rocket hasn't been ridden since October, and I was worried that the battery was gonna be flat, but no, the 8 year old black Motobatt spun the big 2300cc engine over easily, and it fired right up. I couldn't remember when I'd last checked the tyre pressures, so I rode to the nearest gas station, filled it with 98, and pumped up the tyres. Made a huge difference, I couldn't see the gauge on the pump from where I was kneeling, but it took a bit of air before the little beeper told me that the front had 38 psi, and the rear, 42. There's a lot of air in those big tyres. On my last ride I'd installed a cheapo Ebay windscreen extender, which annoyed the crap out of me yesterday, I found myself looking around it as I was riding, so as soon as I hit a little town off the freeway, I pulled out my hex keys and removed it.

Rocket III Thursday 11 January 2024 by Terry Prendergast, on Flickr

It was much better after that, still have the wind blast into the helmet but at least I could see over the top of the screen, which I think I can raise an inch or two, anyway.

Rocket III Thursday 11 January 2024 1 by Terry Prendergast, on Flickr

We had flooding in Central Victoria on Sunday and Monday (weirdest summer that I can remember in years) so as that's my favourite riding area I was a bit concerned with water over roads etc, but it was all good, all the farmers dams were full and some creeks were more like rivers with water almost level with the road in places, and there were a few new potholes, but nothing serious. With fully inflated tyres, I pushed the big beast through the twisties a little faster than sensible, but the Avon tyres are probably the best for these bikes, and it felt very precise and stable. Compared to the black one, it's a bit more relaxed, with a much comfier seat (I had it re-shaped and re-padded in 2011) and a little more leg room. I stopped to take a couple of pics.

Rocket III Thursday 11 January 2024 2 by Terry Prendergast, on Flickr

I rode on to Kilmore. On the way, I came up behind a guy on an old Goldwing, like the one I used to have, a mid 80's 1200. I'm guessing he was an older rider, but he was obviously in a hurry, and was overtaking slower moving vehicles in front of him, one at a time. When I could see a gap in on-coming traffic, I cranked the throttle and passed him and all the other vehicles in one bound, hitting 120 MPH in around 3 or 4 seconds, then quickly slowed back down to semi-legal speeds. This must have pissed him off, because he eventually caught up to me and decided that he needed to pass me too. That didn't go well for him, I just opened it up again and left him behind like he was standing still. He gave up after that, and just followed me the last ten miles or so into Kilmore, where I stopped at my favourite eatery, and he kept going. I parked my bike around the corner from the cafe, took my helmet off and walked around, only to find out that it's closed until the end of the month. Bugger.

It was getting warm, and I was feeling like I needed a cold drink, so rode home via Wandong, then straight up the freeway, where I cruised at 80-90 MPH, where it was safe to do so. All up I did a little over 120 miles in 2 hours or so, and the wife was surprised to see me home so early. It's going to be a stinker today (in the 90's) so no bike rides, instead I think I'll just clean the carbs on my Fireblade and get it ready to sell. It turns 25 years old in June, so eligible for a historic club plate. It'll need new tyres to pass a Roadworthy Inspection, and I'll need to install the OEM muffler that I had to buy from England, but I think I'll probably just sell it in my bid to further reduce the amount of bikes I have as I transition to retirement next year. It's an absolute weapon, but as comfortable as riding a GP bike, so not much good for anything other than short rides, it's only done 12000 miles in 24 years, which is a testament to owning a crotch rocket, they look great and are incredibly fast, but useless in the real world. No biggie, I bought it for cheap and haven't put much into it, so might even make a few bucks when I sell it.

Back to work on Monday, didn't really get a lot done over the Christmas break, but hopefully I'll get ride #4 in on the weekend, before I return to the hum-drum of work, where I'll be back to only riding on weekends. Oh well, as long as I get 24 rides in this year, I'll be happy. ;D

Rocket III Thursday 11 January 2024 3 by Terry Prendergast, on Flickr   
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline spotty

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #28 on: January 11, 2024, 04:31:19 PM »
you got the stinkwheels blue bike going, thats an achievement
i blame Terry

Offline jgger

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #29 on: January 11, 2024, 04:32:13 PM »
Welcome aboard Budman.  I have been looking at the weather that is headed your way and it looks to be very cold, they are even saying possible flash freeze in parts of Texas, Brrrrrrr!

Terry nice pics and be careful about getting caught doing elder abuse on those old Goldwing guys! You really need to get out and ride in that 90° weather to condition yourself for Route 66, 90° ain't nuthin' !August in the.desert ,90° is a good day. I will try to do some more rt 66 that is sorta local for me just to wet your appetite.
« Last Edit: January 11, 2024, 04:34:16 PM by jgger »
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The difference between an ass kisser and brown noser is merely depth perception.  Stolen from RAFster122s

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #30 on: January 11, 2024, 04:41:50 PM »
you got the stinkwheels blue bike going, thats an achievement

Well WE Got it going Spotty, not just me, or it would still be in pieces! I’m in the process of removing the Fireblade’s carbs, it’s already hot, but at least I’m in the shade as I crawl around underneath it trying to loosen the clamps. Hopefully I’ll get the carbs sorted and have it running today. Then a quick lap around the block and a wash, then it’s going on FB Marketplace. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline spotty

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #31 on: January 11, 2024, 04:49:17 PM »
what you need is a nice motorcycle lift, makes all the difference
i blame Terry

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #32 on: January 11, 2024, 05:26:06 PM »
Ha ha, I’ve got one, but need to fix the ram, which will take longer than cleaning my carbs. Next time I’m over at your place remind me to measure the ram on yours so I can order a new one. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline BallAquatics

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #33 on: January 12, 2024, 06:49:37 AM »
Way to go guys.  The weather here refuses to cooperate...   :(

Dennis...  74 CB550  79 CBX  82 Seca Turbo  2011 CBR  2012 NC700X

You will regret the bikes you DIDN'T buy much more than the ones you DID!!!  It's never too late to start a new adventure!

Offline jgger

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #34 on: January 12, 2024, 09:25:38 AM »
Not very good weather for squiding, is it?
"The SOHC4 uses a computer located about 2-3 ft above the seat.  Those sometimes need additional programming." -stolen from  Two Tired

The difference between an ass kisser and brown noser is merely depth perception.  Stolen from RAFster122s

Offline Kelly E

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #35 on: January 12, 2024, 10:35:56 AM »
It's a beautiful sunny day here, to bad it's 12°F 8)
Never Give Up - Never Surrender

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Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #36 on: January 12, 2024, 01:41:00 PM »
The weather here has been awful this week, flooding rain on Sunday and Monday, couple of nice days in between, then stinking hot yesterday. I might have to get out for a ride today or tomorrow, once I finish the work I’ve been doing on the Fireblade. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #37 on: January 14, 2024, 12:24:16 AM »
Well what a weekend. I put the Fireblade back together yesterday and fired it up, gave it a wash, and listed it on FB Marketplace, was overwhelmed with potential buyers (and at least one lowballer) and had it sold within an hour of listing it. Steve, the buyer, picked it up this morning, then after an hour and a half on the phone talking to my 95 year old Ma here in Victoria and my little sister in Brisbane, who's messy divorce turned violent yesterday and involved the police, I needed to go for a ride and clear my head.

Due to all of the above I didn't have as much time as I would have liked, (it's my last day of freedom before returning to work tomorrow) I took a different route, and rode to a little town called Broadford. I parked the bike in a little park while I sat and had a cigarette after encountering a few really big potholes (If Steve Irwin was the Crocodile hunter, I reckon I'm the pothole finder) and took a couple of pics.

Rocket III Sunday 14 January 2024 by Terry Prendergast, on Flickr

I didn't stop for lunch as it was already mid-afternoon, so I took another route home, found all the potholes on that road too, and then eventually hit the freeway for the last 10 miles home. The weekend was a lot busier than I had expected, but I sold another bike, offered to murder my "soon to be ex" brother in law (joking, of course.....) which cheered up my little sis and my Ma, and went for a ride. Did around 90 miles and found some new potholes, but still had a great ride. #4 down, 20 to go. ;D

Rocket III Sunday 14 January 2024 2 by Terry Prendergast, on Flickr 
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline jgger

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #38 on: January 14, 2024, 01:00:32 AM »
Good on you Terry for getting out. Something about hanging on to the bars that makes you let go of all the B.S. that's swirling around us. Wind therapy is the best!

Congrats on being one bike closer to Rt 66, too.
"The SOHC4 uses a computer located about 2-3 ft above the seat.  Those sometimes need additional programming." -stolen from  Two Tired

The difference between an ass kisser and brown noser is merely depth perception.  Stolen from RAFster122s

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #39 on: January 14, 2024, 01:22:06 AM »
Thanks Jim, and that’s a very valid point, I’ve been so focused on selling bikes to clear some space and eventually move my other bikes out of storage before retirement that I hadn’t really thought about what to do with the money. 2 more years of work will (hopefully) go quickly. It might be “Route 66 when I’m 66” because that’ll work out better than trying to squeeze it in sometime between September and December of 2025 when I’m eligible for 3 months paid “Long Service Leave”, so I might work right up to Christmas and then hang up my spurs, and have the first few months of 2026 to properly plan my trip, find a bike to buy and organise for it to be shipped back to Oz after the trip.

That’ll also give me another month of paid annual leave, so 4 months pay will be a nice farewell, even after taxes, and add another $10K to my retirement savings. I’m pretty happy that I’m moving some bikes and so I just need to make sure I don’t weaken and buy any more, but concentrate on selling the ones I don’t want to keep forever while getting the ones I’m going to keep road-ready and finished to my (pretty loose) standards. I can always re-restore some of them once I retire. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline ofreen

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #40 on: January 14, 2024, 11:40:37 AM »
...It might be “Route 66 when I’m 66” because that’ll work out better than trying to squeeze it in sometime between September and December of 2025 when I’m eligible for 3 months paid “Long Service Leave”, so I might work right up to Christmas and then hang up my spurs, and have the first few months of 2026 to properly plan my trip, find a bike to buy and organise for it to be shipped back to Oz after the trip.
That’ll also give me another month of paid annual leave, so 4 months pay will be a nice farewell, even after taxes, and add another $10K to my retirement savings.

I kept thinking up reasons to delay my final retirement, too, eventually pulling the plug 2 years after I originally planned.  I have been making fun of my brother who originally was to retire at the end of 2023, now he says the end of April.  Hard to get the old horses out of the harness sometimes.
Greg
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Offline jgger

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #41 on: January 14, 2024, 12:44:47 PM »
So true Greg. I had a plan, at 69 when I started collecting social security I was going to continue working until my birthday in August. Except covid, a sugery and recovery, and our current vegetable in chief's economy slowed things down to the point of no more work. I don't miss getting up at 4:30 to 5 am for the 1 1/2  to 2 hour commute,  but the pay check was nice. Plus it is hard to adjust sometimes.  If they had an anti-recliner chair vax, I would consider it! At 71 the illusion that we have any control over our time is evaporating which makes enjoying life so much more important.  LET'S RIDE!
"The SOHC4 uses a computer located about 2-3 ft above the seat.  Those sometimes need additional programming." -stolen from  Two Tired

The difference between an ass kisser and brown noser is merely depth perception.  Stolen from RAFster122s

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #42 on: January 14, 2024, 01:52:48 PM »
I’m lucky that once I retire I can keep doing Army Reserve work until I’m 70 if I want to, so the plan will be to do a day or two per week of tax free money to supplement my retirement savings and reduce the shock of having worked full time for over 50 years to doing nothing.

It’ll also get me out of the house a couple of days a week, which will probably make the wife happy too. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline BallAquatics

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #43 on: January 14, 2024, 03:21:59 PM »
That's what I've settled into Terry.  I work 2 days a week at the Home Depot on what they call the MET team.  We build the displays, change the racking, set the events, enough variety that it never gets boring.  Half the team is retired like me.  Gets us out, some extra FUN money, plus I get to socialize with a great group of people.
Dennis...  74 CB550  79 CBX  82 Seca Turbo  2011 CBR  2012 NC700X

You will regret the bikes you DIDN'T buy much more than the ones you DID!!!  It's never too late to start a new adventure!

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #44 on: January 14, 2024, 03:48:43 PM »
Thanks Dennis, my cousin and one of my friends both retired around the same time a couple of years ago. Shortly after my cousin (best mechanic I’ve ever known) picked up a job fixing troublesome European cars 1-2 days per week, especially older ones without OBD ports that modern mechanics can’t fix.

My mate was totally lost, was getting out of bed later every morning and just sitting around his house with no motivation. I see my cuz regularly and he’s always busy but I haven’t seen my mate for awhile, my sis says that his wife (her friend) isn’t happy with him but doesn’t know what to do, he’s got cars and bikes to play with but he’s always been very slow to finish anything, and now it’s almost like he’s given up. It’s weird because he hated his job and was happy to take early retirement, but has no plans at all now, and has always hated spending money so will probably die from boredom. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline budman

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #45 on: January 15, 2024, 08:29:12 AM »
Woke up to 13F temps this morning.  Supposed to be 9F tomorrow morning, then a high of 68F on Thursday afternoon.  Back down to 24F on Friday.  Looks like we got our 3% chance of snow this morning.

If there’s not too much wind or wet roads on Thursday I’m hoping to go for a ride.

Bud

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2021 Indian Scout

Offline BallAquatics

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #46 on: January 15, 2024, 11:35:32 AM »
Woke up to 13F temps this morning.  Supposed to be 9F tomorrow morning, then a high of 68F on Thursday afternoon.  Back down to 24F on Friday. 

Hey Bud, the weather sucks here too.  Was -1F this morning, but it's warmed up to 11F...  feels like 1F with the wind chill.  Forecast says maybe 40's end of next week, but raining.

Glad I've got plenty of shop work.  I guess in a way, I enjoy wrenching on my bikes almost as much as riding.  Which is a big plus when you live somewhere that the weather doesn't cooperate for several months each year.
Dennis...  74 CB550  79 CBX  82 Seca Turbo  2011 CBR  2012 NC700X

You will regret the bikes you DIDN'T buy much more than the ones you DID!!!  It's never too late to start a new adventure!

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #47 on: January 15, 2024, 02:03:10 PM »
I’m looking at all that snow and shivering at the thought of it, it’s not 9am yet and already in the 70’s. Will only get to high 80’s, but even that is a bit warm when wearing a jacket, boots, helmet and gloves. Not that it matters, I’m back at work now, so looking forward to getting a ride in on the weekend. Bud, enjoy your ride if you get out on Thursday, but don’t take any risks, I really don’t enjoy riding on wet roads anymore, at almost 64, I don’t just bounce like I did when I was 20. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)

Offline RAFster122s

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #48 on: January 15, 2024, 11:14:00 PM »
Thanks Dennis, my cousin and one of my friends both retired around the same time a couple of years ago. Shortly after my cousin (best mechanic I’ve ever known) picked up a job fixing troublesome European cars 1-2 days per week, especially older ones without OBD ports that modern mechanics can’t fix.

My mate was totally lost, was getting out of bed later every morning and just sitting around his house with no motivation. I see my cuz regularly and he’s always busy but I haven’t seen my mate for awhile, my sis says that his wife (her friend) isn’t happy with him but doesn’t know what to do, he’s got cars and bikes to play with but he’s always been very slow to finish anything, and now it’s almost like he’s given up. It’s weird because he hated his job and was happy to take early retirement, but has no plans at all now, and has always hated spending money so will probably die from boredom. ;D

Classic signs of male depression Terry. He lost his purpose that work gave him...he doesn't have the social interaction with coworkers no internal drive or motivation as depression gives you fatigue and reduced or eliminates your motivation. You have to have a spark if a plan and marshall your will power again to break the cycle. His wife will only drive him further into depression if she nags in him to do something. She would have to be skilled to find that which can motivate him. I would suggest she start working with wives if his friends he hangs out with or did hang with to invite them over for dinner or cookouts and get her bubby engaged with guys for him to hang out with to slyly have him see his guy friends who can roll up sleeves and throw a shop denim or canvas apron , she should buy him a couple he can throw on over good clothes.  Why 2, well one for him and a friend. A lab coat style coat for cooler weather works well too. You want something that can keep your clothes clean...
Throw them in the wash every few weeks or months or however frequent.
Once you start using them you will find they are quite handy. Having them available your mates don't have to worry about pitching in and giving you a hand. The wife can tell her hubby she feels like she's married to a different man when he's donning his new apron or lab/shop coat and spice things up a little showing him some intimacy...
Basically she is going to have to get various friends over and make friends with his friends girlfriends and wives and throw parties if larger groups. Have people chip in to bring stuff to eat and drink to the parties and basically bring him out if his depression by helping him replace the old purpose with that of his hobbies and interests. Any smart woman knows a man enjoys eating and being ir rolling up his sleeves working in stuff. If he is into bikes then suggest the guys do some work on one if his bikes to get them going and put h the idea to other wives to have their hubbies help a brother out be it to help wrench a bit or help work on a few things to help their friend out and help him transition to retired life and get his projects going with some subtle things to do. Play card games, or throw darts or horseshoes, or bocce ball games or Cornhole games or any number of other things to pull him out of his depression to get him interacting with others. The isolation he is inducing in himself is what will kill him as he will die of boredom and lack of purpose as the mind and internal dialogue will go toxic more easily in some than others.

Good book on internal dialogue and to understand and correct that and help deal with anxiety, depression, and internal negative dialogue is "Dealing with you mental mess". It is really a good book and gives you concrete ways abd describes how to clean up the negatives we can put ourselves through. It is about neuroplasticity and that is how we can change the negative BS we can put ourselves through. I am finding the book to be beneficial. A counselor who I have seen in the past knows I have a steady negative stream of thoughts I battle and have all my life, that negative internal dialogue is debilitating and it feeds my depression in super unhealthy ways. That negative dialogue is what really drives my depression and I have to do things to quiet that internal voice or overcome it by doing the things that bring me joy or happiness and satisfaction. Well addressing that internal negative thought train is key to breaking that cycle. Well this book is actually very useful and beneficial and is helping me change something I have fought for 50-60 years...
No #$%*, it works. It isn't cerebral and the author dies a great job at giving a book that isn't huge and it is written in understandable way so you can grasp the concepts and provides you a roadmap to make these changes and it is addressing how you go about making those changes. Sure it requires effort, but the author sucks you in as it reveals how we can address those things which may be affecting us so it resonates with us and we want to learn more about how to stop the bs. If you are lucky enough to not have this problem then say a prayer of thanks to your creator God and thank Him for not allowing you to have that challenge in your life. If you do deal with sine self criticism internally then you are really going to find this book helpful. Heck read it with your spouse if married, give her her own book mark and you gave yours, or read it together in bed or over coffee or in a comfortable seats. It won't be something some guys are comfortable doing together or maybe they died it later. Women are driven differently than men being more emotions based whereas we guys have the strength or ability to compartmentalize things. We take time to switch to different compartments but we have to be able to open those compartments and transition into the mindset. So, spending time to deal with this topic is tough if we don't think these soft things are much good. These are real and the soft things are what is controlling our actions and inactions. So, how do you kill or quiet that toxic dialogue, you have to dismantle it and change how you think about things, what you allow that internal dialogue to be telling you.

Yeah, I know...it is a strange post, if you dismiss it as BS if you want, but I can tell you it isn't BS.  I've spent thousands to tens of  of dollars in therapy over the years and lots of it was worthless as it never adequately for to the root and how to rip out the root if that problem. You can tell a guy to suck it up or stuff it down and he may be able to fir a while. But all that stuffing it down can build to the point you cannot stuff it down anymore and when it forces it's way out it is going to do so in very Ugly and very damaging ways. It can break you and you never be the same. It is what fuels PTSD and depression and anxiety and lots of other unhealthy things
That stuffing it down leads to physical health issues and mental health issues. I'm not telling you to become some let it all hang out gushing with tears kind of person wearing your heart and emotions in your sleeve. That isn't needed or desirable. We all need to release the negative stuff in our lives, if we don't do it and try to stuff it down that negative stuff will hurt you eventually, be it making you a grumpy old fart or some other way.

I've said way too much. Sorry for the verbal diarrhea...
Just trying to be helpful I have always been a person who likes helping, just in my nature for some reason. Sometimes you have to help yourself before you can help others...take time for yourself ...you are worth taking that time and energy.

Personally, I think this book is good for anyone. Even if you don't have the problems it is designed to help with. It can help you learn about the issues some men face and you never know, you could be the person or people who help a friend in need, you might help someone considering death as a better answer than the mental mess driving them to that toxic thought of ending their life as they have no hope or purpose and they cannot seem to fix that bs and that just digs their hole deeper, making it even harder to make the changes.

There is no shame in getting some help, be it from your friends who care about you at some level or if you need a bit if help from a medication, they may have to try a couple to find one that helps, but there is no shame in getting help or being helped get through a rough patch
 There is shame when you realize you might have helped and didn't help someone you knew.

David - trying to break that mental mess to be a better person and have better life, for whatever remains of it, be it a short or long life. I think it will be a short one, just a sixth sense I have about that topic. That's ok though, I'm ready to meet my maker however long it takes.
David- back in the desert SW!

Offline Terry in Australia

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Re: 24 Rides in 2024, Frank's New Years resolution that we can all enjoy.
« Reply #49 on: January 15, 2024, 11:34:21 PM »
Thanks David, I’m sure that’s all true, I should have mentioned that his wife is just as “frugal” as he is, so she won’t be throwing parties to attract their olf friends back, and to give you an idea of how slow he’s always been to get anything done, he hasn’t finished the restoration he started on his VW Kharman Ghia that he started in the late 70’s. His wife was a “triple certificate” nurse and he was a telephone tech so they never had any shortage of money, they just hate spending it.

They’ve had overseas holidays and live in a really nice house, but are so tight they won’t even insure the house, cars, his bike, etc. They’ve been like this as long as I’ve known them, so I don’t think anything will change. That’s life, each to his (or her) own, I’d rather enjoy my retirement wrenching and riding. ;D
I was feeling sorry for myself because I couldn't afford new bike boots, until I met a man with no legs.

So I said, "Hey mate, you haven't got any bike boots you don't need, do you?"

"Crazy is a very misunderstood term, it's a fine line that some of us can lean over and still keep our balance" (thanks RB550Four)