Topic: Reasons Someone Should Have Killed Me By Now...

[faux fiddy]

This was  windsurfing.. Damsels in distress and bikinis floating dead in the water. Inoperative  solenoid  so I used my left index finger to engage it. Ripped the end of my finger open, hangin like a snake's mouth. Lesson: use a screw driver or anything else.

Then there's Mikey with his  Yamaha 750.  He was working on it at a friend's house owned by the friend's mom. Took the tank off, and didn't notice that it continued to dribble in the garage.

Walked away with it like that, dribbling gas.  Water heater cycled on, sparked a small garage explosion. House and bike were a total loss. Nice, new modern house on the lot now.  All's well that ends well.

Take that back, Bike not a total loss, but mostly melted. The pipes off the bike are going to be modded to fit my 350f. If anyone wants a Yamaha 750 frame or motor that was in the fire, it should probably go away.

[Thunder]

Was riding late one night with some mates, belting it around a familiar road near where i live.
I was in front and thought i would scare the hell out of em by grinding my steel toecaps(was wearing MX boots) on the tar creating sparks...

I did so , but putting pressure on my foot made me drift wide, when i hit a cats eye (reflector placed in the tar, sticks out about 1 cm) with my firmly planted boot.

Apparently even more impressive than the sparks was me trying to stay on the bike...


Broken toe.

[razor02097]

Cresting a hill airborne on the RM250 only to find out there is a gap I will not clear.... I never bruise.... except that time.

[The_Crippler]

This thread has brought smiles to my face.

[BobbyR]

After reading these I now know that God loves SOHC Owners.

[Frankencake]

1.  Me cutting the front axle out of a Toyota SR5.  Engine was removed so it was easy access.  Tall dry grass under truck.  Fire starts.  Truck parked next to my boat.  Me jump in boat, grab extinguisher and turn truck in to f**king powdered doughnut. 
2.  First time on my ex's fathers 400F.  I rode away and rang it out.  Call from the church a few miles away after I ran the battery down because it won't start.  Ex's father gets there, turns the petcock on, kick starts it and drives it away.  He never liked me.
3.  I bought a DOHC as my first bike.

[The_Crippler]

3.  I bought a DOHC as my first bike.

Didn't realize that counted as stupid - I did as well.  Also put the wrong kind of oil in it and blew the first engine.

[razor02097]

Problem solving at its finest

((DOHC bike +/- young kid)*throttle happy)

((DOHC bike + young kid)*throttle happy) = wreck
((DOHC bike - young kid)*throttle happy) = speeding tickets

[sangyo soichiro]

When I was 17 I rode a Honda Rebel 450.  I was at a Jack Frost drive-in in my home town where I was flirting with a girl I had the hots for - doing the whole "look how cool I am.  I'm 17 and ride a motorcycle" routine.  After impressing her with my smile and wit,  I immediately pulled out in front of a car that had to slam on the brakes.  I never looked back to see if she saw it, but she ended up dating someone else, so that probably answers that question.  I later was next to that car that slammed on the brakes at a stop light and gave them a "Oh thank you so much for not killing me" look.

[KRONUS0100]

where to start........I will never wear cowboy boots on a bike again..they make riding boots for a reason....I tried to make a emergency stop on a gs500e....stepped right over the handlebars and proceeded to slide across the intersection into oncoming traffic.

i too have washed my shop rags in the washing machine
I also mistakenly wrapped a sandwchich in a shop rag and put it in the microwave....REAL BIG OOPS!!!

[Queeg]

i dont know about kill me but... i was at the supply house today. backed thrailer out with 100' of 2" pvc. 100' of 3/4" conduit and a bunch  of fittings.
 backed out and this idiot pulls right up to my bumper. and waits for me too move.
i couldnt move cause my trailer was up to a car. and i only now had the option of pulling forward.

 i motioned to let him knowi had a trailer  and couldnt back up. and he just sat there honking. he finally backed off and i was all frustrated and floored the truck.
spun the tires a little and the turbo lit and bam. snapped the pinion gear shaft at the gear. wedging the gear into the housing skidding to a  hault.
ouch... but hahah he had to wait an hour for the tow truck to move me.

 anger+built diesel truck+ trailer = turn off the tuner chip or else!!
now off to finish the g/fs bike!

[lynchj]

OK one more.... never wear a hoodie sweatshirt with the strings from the hood dangling when you are using an angle grinder.
And another angle grinder story, polar fleece melts when showered in sparks, especially when the sparks are going up your sleeve. Don't ask how I know these things.

[Frankenkit]

ow.
bicycle+icy, wet storm drain grate + car close behind=life flashing before eyes.

[bistromath]

When using a fleece jacket as a cushion under your a$$ on an 8-hour ride, DON'T STAND UP TO STRETCH. It'll get caught in the rear sprocket and lock the wheel at 75MPH.

[The_Crippler]

When using a fleece jacket as a cushion under your a$$ on an 8-hour ride, DON'T STAND UP TO STRETCH. It'll get caught in the rear sprocket and lock the wheel at 75MPH.

That made my butt-hole pucker just thinking about it.  Yeesh.